Coming Down

:(
:(
Jul 10, 2017 · 4 min read

To the reader: there are two bodies in this story and not a single soul. Your antagonist is both of them. Your protagonist is no one. There are no double standards here, a gender can be as cynical and cruel as another and it is interesting to observe both soulless beings collide. See here in this alleyway everything ceases to exist except the blonde boy that drank too much and his vomit, followed by his piss, and the brunette girl that drank too much and her piss, followed by her vomit. As I said, there are no double standards. Both are simply only empty sexual vessels with only synthetic happiness pushing them along life. In a different alleyway with a different one-time partner one would be the lamb, and the other the slaughter but this case is different.

Perhaps I should mention that they have met before. That three hours earlier, prior to her sneaking into the show that played next door, and prior to her sprinting to the bottle-o right before it closed, they were in the same alleyway but at a significant distance to each other. That the fat lamb paved itself into the ground as vomit and simultaneously her first impression of him. That his eyes glistening, complimented the night sky, the lights that shone through west end and later on followed the girl with the gunshot flask. Both identical in self destruction and yet society views them differently. The event of this ‘one night stand’ is unfortunate for the beings that can see outside it for each antagonist here had someone at a close distance that could’ve provided a long term fix. Here, the story becomes ironic in itself because they were ‘that kind of person’ to crave a quick fix even though every time a quick fix was used it ended in ultimate chaos, including this time.

Each has a method that results and successfully provides them with ‘a fuck’. ‘a fuck’ is defined as a sexual release between two people with no emotions or meaning included. ‘a fuck’ is deemed degrading, and both desire to degrade and lower themselves 6ft underground, thus, ‘a fuck’ is appropriate in this context even if the language is not. The blonde boy focuses on the emotional, intimate, self esteem method; where he compliments, delicately touches and slowly moves closer. The brunette girl focuses on sensitivity, enticing them by almost touching them and strategically pushing them away at the right time. Curating each movement, ending the night with a temporary successful release, they can be branded as young gods catching rats in cages.

It’s funny how their methods differ and somehow specialise in how society views them. The female, the submissive, the weaker one, the brunette girl uses her sexuality to advance the mood at the right time whereas the male, the dominant, the stronger one, the blonde boy uses feelings and intimacy. Tossing, turning and testing the ways of what’s on the table made them realise that by defying society they become ‘different’, special, a creature the other gender hasn’t seen and thus, they are exciting, complex, and sexy.

By now you’re wondering what their names are; this is not important for you are as distant to them as they are to each other. None of these ‘gods’ are able to remember the names they encounter, only what was said to them, “when I look into your eyes I feel like I can see your soul” (the blonde boy to the brunette girl). Names lack the atmosphere the alleyway entails. Tiny details are what creates the timeline on this adventure; the Black Sabbath tattoo that covered the blonde boy’s arm, the way the brunette girl softly tucked strands of hair behind her ear, the drops of rain disguising their tears that simply only leak with no meaning for they are too numb to feel anything; a sort of numbness that can only be healed with ‘plastic’. Plastic here signifies substances that provoke emotions.

Here in this flower piss filled alleyway next to an underlaying chaos, for those 15 minutes there was touching, inappropriate and appropriate, a licking of lips for preparation, a gush of wind bringing them physically closer and a compatibility that only soul mates can possess. However, their connection though interlaced, was meaningless. In a different time, maybe later in their year had they met things would’ve been long term, a beautiful, bright, blossoming long term timeline but due to their self destructiveness this is not what happened on this night. For that to occur both would have to be emotionally vulnerable, something neither of them are ready for, something neither of them are able to comprehend and thus they leave the alleyway taking separate paths. Once filled with euphoria they are now filled with guilt for what they’ve done to the other person and to themselves. And as quickly as the night begun the night ended, and so does the story.