ANNOUNCEMENT: I have a new Bengals consigliere
Everyone needs a special adviser, so now I have one. He goes by the alias “Chili Dog,” and I know nothing about him aside from the fact he loves the Bengals and HATES Andy Dalton.
After he was banned from the comment section of Cincy Jungle (SB Nation’s Bengals blog), I reached out on Facebook just to catch up with him and see what’s going on. Since then, he’s been randomly firing off countless unprovoked paragraphs of hot takes into my inbox. And just because I think they’re funny, I’m going to unleash them on the public.
So without further ado, here’s my blog which is literally just a copy/pasted take from my Bengals consigliere, which he delivered to me via Facebook Messenger.
[Carson] Palmer told Coach [Marvin] Lewis i want nothing to do with you. I have 32 million in the bank. I simply want to part ways with Brown and Lewis. Carson went so far as to enter Front Office like Boomer and Demands a Trade.
[Owner] Mike [Brown] said stick it out this season and you will be traded after this season. Carson says no way. Owner says losing Carson sent The Bengals Back Years.
Why did Carson Tell Mike Brown and Coach Lewis To Go To Hell. Im Out and walk away from Team Bengal.
It could not be money for either Bommer (Boomer Esiason) or Carson. To different QBs years apart said they want out out of Cincy. Who is the person that drives a QB TO THIS STATE OF mind? I am being honest to Fault.
The above is my flow chat. 1000 words could follow.
Haven’t heard back from him yet, but #ConsigliereTakes are going to keep coming.