The Asinine Made-Up Words Of Advertising
The Uncola was a good one. Maybe the last good one.
Last week, Axe debuted a series of :15 spots promoting their body wash products. They’re mildly amusing ads (watch them here) featuring a chatty likeable man sitting in a very sudsy bathtub.
Starting about five years ago, Axe (Lynx in the U.K.) abruptly discontinued their very successful “objectifying women” worldwide marketing strategy and began portraying their core customer as a sensitive-yet-still-mildly-masculine fella; the kind of young man who could confidently take a bath and rip muffled water farts.
Which brings us to the new campaign’s sign-off:
Neither the bathing man nor an announcer vocalizes “#bathsculinity”. (Yes, it’s hashtagged, please go share bath selfies with your fellow semi-tough snowflakes.) Try saying it out loud a few times. Feel your mouth and your brain fighting you? That’s because it’s FUCKING IMBECILIC.
In 2013, Nestle’s low-fat dessert brand Skinny Cow (yikes, that mascot) tried to commercialize the concept of a “woman cave”. Women (and a few men, I guess) entered a sweepstakes to win $10,000 ostensibly to be used to create the ideal “lady lair”. OK, fine. Not OK or fine was Skinny Cow trying to make the word “WoCavé” (pronounced “wo-cah-vay”) happen.
From the Skinny Cow press release:
“A Wocave™… (is) where the ladies can kick up their heels with their BFFs, unwrap some ice cream sandwiches or delicious candy and dive into a few gossip magazines…”
(It’s since been discovered that “wocavé is actually an obscure Spanish word that means “mindless escapist emotionally unhealthy gorging”.)
Briefly, here are a few more of the worst “ad words” from the last 10 years or so.