my head is so loud
Sometimes, my head gets so unbearably loud. It’s like a party in my mind, but I didn’t invite anyone. All those voices, thoughts, and worries are chatting and screaming simultaneously, and they don’t stop, no matter how badly I wish for it.
It feels like my head is full of mush, and it’s tough to focus on anything else when my head gets so loud. Sometimes, the mush is just whispering with little voices. Another day, my head feels like there’s a rock concert going on.
About a thousand people are shouting simultaneously, and it’s all so confusingly tiring. I try to tell them to be quiet, but they won’t listen. When my head is this loud, it’s hard to do anything ‘normal.’
For example, I cannot listen well at school or talk to my friends. I cannot enjoy my favorite things to do, like reading a book or playing a game. Noise is everywhere, and I’m stuck with it.
And it’s hard to tell someone about it. I’m scared that they won’t understand. What if they think I’m just weird or crazy?
Keeping it all inside my head does not help with the noise; it makes it louder. I remember when I first told my mum about the noise. I was scared, but she listened to me carefully and did not make any weird face or sound whatsoever.
Then she told me that it was okay to feel that way and that she would find…
