The very definition of FEEDBACK for English Languages Learners as per Merriam-Webster.com is:
- helpful information or criticism that is given to someone to say what can be done to improve a performance, product, etc.
- something (such as information or electricity) that is returned to a machine, system, or process;
- an annoying and unwanted sound caused by signals being returned to an electronic sound system.
Don’t these definitions strike a smile on your face when you think of different situations when you received feedback? They do to me. Why? Because most of the people, in different roles, have no clue what they are doing when they are supposed to give feedback. Some really are “an annoying and unwanted sound”.
And more than that, the reality is very close to what Bob Goff said:
Most people need love and acceptance a lot more than they need advice. — Bob Goff
So why should we even bother with feedback? Because we all require feedback if we want to keep learning and growing.
Giving feedback is not something that should be taken lightly though. Actually, giving feedback that leads to constructive outcome may be quite difficult. Someone’s intentions might be coming from a good place but how that feedback is delivered makes all the difference. So giving feedback is a skill that people should develop before thinking of giving feedback.
Receiving feedback is a skill too. If you are one of those people that ask for feedback, you need to make sure you are prepared to receive it. Or if you work in an organisation that uses 360degrees reviews, done by managers that are more bullies than leaders, then you need to have a deeper understanding of different kind of feedback models also. And how to manage the feedback received.
There are a few feedback models out there, managers and coaches of all sorts, can learn from. And not only them, I would say anyone who works in a team, should be aware of these models and learn from them, considering that sooner or later, someone will ask your opinion on things. And thats a feedback. It can happen in your professional life or in your personal life. And things are not as easy or simple as they seem.
Today I will share with you my take on one of the most misused Feedback Models.
The Feedback Sandwich.
This feedback tool consists of 3 steps:
- Identify the positive aspects and start with them;
Note: avoid using the word “but” after you communicated the positive aspects, as it will completely cancel everything you said before it.
2. Present the facts.
Note: present the facts as they happened, NOT your perception or your opinion on them. Stay away from assumptions, judgements, shame or blame inducing comments or any of your own diagnosis.
3. Offer to join & work together on the aspects that need improvement, either by demonstrating how it should be done correctly (if its something concrete as lets say — writing code) or provide success stories or ways of doing things that worked before.
Note: Although recommended and used in management development, consulting and Human Resources practices for years, the Feedback Sandwich it is known by now, as not the best option for constructive results, and that’s because of the 3rd step:
Most of the ‘feedback givers’ point out the negative or what was wrong, without giving the suggestions on how it could be done better.
Close with specific encouragement which builds up the learner’s trust that the positive aspects mentioned in step 1, plus the improvements that will come out from step 3, will together lead to a greater outcome then before. Make sure that you are building a collaboration and you both understand that the results that will come out of this, will reflect on both of you. (This is another step that is treated in a supperficial manner and affects the outcome of using this type of feedback model.)
But if you ever think of using such a model, I would suggest including 2 extra essential steps (steps that usually are ignored by most of the managers that use this model):
0. Preparation.
Although giving feedback might seem spontaneous, it should not be. Make sure you go into a ‘feedback situation’ with careful forethought and preparation. If there is no time for that, I would rather guide “my feedback partner” with well thought questions that will lead him/her to find the answers than to give him the solution I see in the moment. Especially because most of the situations are more complex than they appear.
4. Follow Up.
Pay close attention to the evolution of things after the feedback session and monitor if behaviour change is happening. If you don’t follow up, your coaching might be forgotten.
