When we stopped being proud of working in tech
Somewhere between Silicon Valley and Silicon Valley.
Between Steve Jobs and Tim Cook.
Between the first Uber we hailed and the last Lyft, wherein the driver was nice but we felt gross at how we knew this Lyft Line was only worth about $4.50 to him.
Between jeans and tees because damn-the-Man to Jeans and Tees(TM), officially licensed wardrobe of The Man, available in small supply at nationwide Targets in the GoodFellow collection.
Between tech millionaires and tech billionaires.
Between Deep Blue just beat Kasparov and oops… our AI thinks you’re a gorilla.
Between “bro I just landed a kickflip” and “bro I just landed the last commitment on my series A bridge round for $3.4M.”
Between Farmville and Fortnite.
Between a healthy, full collegiate beard and Beardbrand’s $120k monthly revenue selling beard oil to the nation-state of Brooklyn.
Between Bush, when we were so hype to use tech to save the world, and Trump, when we realized saving the world was far more complex than we could have imagined… and maybe we’re not the right people for the job.
Between Facebook requiring a college on the sign up form and Facebook requiring your liberty on the sign up form.
Between Mountain Lion and High Sierra.
Between sex robots in the latest tech noir cyberpunk thriller and sex robots, trending 🔥HOT🔥 in this month’s Vogue Hottest Trends matrix.
Between the news is such a downer and I’m not really sure what the news is anymore, but this all sounds bad af.
Between Edward Snowden directed by Oliver Stone, and James Comey’s A Higher Loyalty, coming soon to a Barnes & Noble near you.
Between Vine, by Twitter, and Trump, by Twitter.
Between How.com’s four step answer to ‘How do I bake a potato?’ and Best Bite’s 60 second demonstration of elegantly manicured hands making Bacon, Mac & Cheesecake, 3.7 million views.
Between the Kindle, the new home for your books, and Amazon Prime, the new home for every other thing in your home. Coming soon: Your home, shipped to you in two days, via Amazon Prime Plus Mortgages.
Between the height of the Occupy movement and the approximate two months it took us all to prematurely spurt out all of our radical energy and get back to chasing that paper.
Between seeing our first angel investor as an actual angel and seeing venture capitalists as actual, literal vampires.
Between thinking, how cool we might get a 401k match this year to thinking what’s the point of my salary I just need Ethereum to hit 2000, nothing else matters.
Between the occasional all-nighter to get some shit done and 90% effective time microdosing to capture maximal creative output in the Flow state.
Between getting Facebook ad targeting down to less than $0.01 and getting Facebook ad targeting down to living, breathing Nazis.
Between Air Force Ones and Yeezys.
Between adding a share button to a product page and adding a randomly-generated tier-based reward system powered by microtransactions.
Between hoodie Zuckerberg and suit Zuckerberg.
Between the X-Pro II filter makes all of my pictures look stunning and filter or #nofilter this Insta feed makes my entire life look stunningly unworthy in comparison.
Between let’s whiteboard some shit and wait, I don’t think we’re using Integrated Design Thinking by IBM’s formal fourth step in the how-to-think-about-shit process.
Between our baby Siri’s first words and her latest motherfucker.
Between Hollywood, we’re really banking on Christoper Nolan, and Disneytown, formerly known as Hollywood, sponsored by Duane the Rock Johnson’s Instagram feed and Marvel Comics.
Between Morpheus offering Neo the red pill and pretty much everyone saying no dude, no thank you to r/theredpill.
Between $500k seed rounds and $6M seed rounds.
Between Color Labs’ $41 million and Magic Leap’s $2.3 billion.
Between the idea that we’d get out of school and buddy up with our friends and get some money and make some cool stuff and the realization that we could do exactly that because, mostly our privilege, so we did… and then did it some more and some more and that now that we’ve done it and seen what’s happened when 22-year-old’s have access to millions, the heart’s been sucked out and we’re left working in a world that’s given us a lot of comfort and ease and that we’ve pretty much fucked into a nightmare state our younger selves couldn’t possibly have imagined.
Probably right about then.
On a positive note… I think we can do better, or find the people that deserve a shot at trying.