How Not To Be A Jerk Music Fan

For fans of independent musicians…the kind of musicians that travel in hatchbacks to gig after gig, that use Facebook and email to promote their shows, and who need you to support them to keep doing their thing. Some ideas to make your musician’s life easier.

Don’t tell them you can’t make it.

They don’t care why you can’t make it. It’s demoralizing to post a Facebook event and have 6 posts in a row of “Sorry I have work” or “My kid has a soccer game.” Cool. DON’T TELL THE WORLD. It looks bad and makes the musician feel like shit.

Don’t text/message the musician for details before the gig.

It probably makes you look cool when you say “I’ll just check with the band to see when doors open.” (This really happens!!) NO. The band is busy driving, loading in, sound checking, calling their family, setting up merch, and prepping for the show. The venue has the info if you need it. Go to the artist’s website (if they’re worth a damn the info will be on there). Go to the venue website (if they’re worth a damn the info will be on there). DO NOT MAKE THE MUSICIAN YOUR PERSONAL CONCIERGE.

If you RSVP yes, fucking go.

Facebook has killed the art of the RSVP, I guess. People can now just be “Interested” in events which makes the responsibility to go dwindle down to nothing. A lot of indie musicians, especially singer-songwriters, do house concerts. Hosts will invite people over to their homes and the musician will get paid by a door donation. Imagine having 30 people RSVP’d as yes (a potential $450 in door money plus merch sales coming) and then show up to 12 people, because 16 of you can’t get your shit together enough to respect an RSVP. Long day at work? The musician might have driven 6 hours to get there to set up for 2 hours to play their heart out for you for 2 more hours. Your $15 might get them to the next gas station. You might fall in love with a song that changes your life. Just go if you told the host you’re gonna go.

Bring friends. Don’t be a loner weirdo.

I get it. Sometimes we like our favorite musicians to be our little secret. Our thing. But on the indie level, the only way they’ll be able to keep doing what they do is if they grow their fan base. They can’t just play the to same 6 people all the time. That’s a quick route to a temp agency job. You as a fan HAVE to recruit if you care. If you believe in the music of a certain artist, you have to share it and invite people along.

Don’t talk to the musician when they’re on stage.

If it’s before the show, they’re either setting up their shit so it works right or they’re getting into the performance mode. If it’s during the show, DEFINITELY do not try to have a fucking conversation with the artist on stage. If they just finished the show, let them breathe for a sec for godssake. And if they’re trying to pack their shit up so they can drive all night, let them do it. Wait until they step off the stage into the crowd or go to the merch table to chat.

Listen to the music.

Don’t be one of those people that goes to a venue to take a selfie to prove you were there and then just talk the whole time. People don’t pay $15 to hear you talk.

Don’t request stuff more than once.

They heard you. They’re going to play it or they’re not. They either know it or they don’t. They are sticking to their set list or they will add it in. You wearing them down because you wanted to hear Orange Blossom Special is not a badge of honor.

Buy the musician’s stuff.

Treat it like taxes…an obligatory fee to keep good things like art in the world. Look, I know you already paid a ticket price or a cover charge. I know beer is expensive. But those CDs and those t-shirts? Those REALLY help. They make the difference on a tour…sometimes they make the show worth doing if the door money is bad. Plus you feel good. Plus you get cool merch. It’s the musicians’ responsibility to have cool stuff…if they don’t, well…let them know. If they DO have cool stuff then buy it!

Don’t ask for free shit.

Don’t ask to be on the list. Don’t ask to trade CDs if you’ve got a demo you made in your spare bedroom. Don’t ask for a discount. Musicians don’t have much room on margins when you total up the whole cost of making an album or printing t-shirts. Don’t devalue their work.

Musicians love their fans, they really do. Following these rules will take away some of those unnecessary moments of anxiety and existential dread in your favorite artist’s life. Do it.