Too Real: Top 10 Songs of 2018

2018 felt like a verse of We Didn’t Start The Fire on speed:

Elon Smoked Pot! Thanos snapped! BDE! Trump is crap!
Brett Kavanaugh! Walmart Kid! Royal Wedding! Eagles Win!
Shaggy Collabs with Sting!
Fortnite, Is This Your King?
Donald Glover as Lando!
Weezer just covered Toto!

It’s safe to say that too much happened this year. Between the continued embarrassment of the federal government and the hellfire birth of my arch-nemesis Gritty, the race to the finish feels more like a slog through quicksand — hoping with each earth-swallowing news cycle that the next absurdity doesn’t snuff us out for good.

Luckily, quality music is here to carry us over the finish line. Here are my top 10 songs of 2018, and some thoughts on why they may be better at talking about this year than I am:

10. Black Flamingo — Teenage Wrist

If there’s a question whether rock music is dead (it’s not), then it must be assumed that grunge met its demise more than two decades ago, declared terminal once it lost its lead spokesperson, withering away with the 20th century. But Kamtin Mohager has other ideas.

I wrote about Teenage Wrist earlier this year as a band to watch. Kamtin and the crew toured relentlessly in support of their first full-length album, Chrome Neon Jesus (#1 on the list of 2018 album titles, clearly). “Black Flamingo” quickly caught on as a fan favorite for its cathartic chorus — and that “I can be your Lithium” lyric did not go unnoticed by those still wearing their smiley-face t-shirts.

Mohager has more tricks up his sleeve, teasing that new tunes from his other project, The Chain Gang of 1974, can be expected in 2019. If Teenage Wrist takes a backseat for a short while, “Black Flamingo” and the rest of Chrome Neon Jesus have the long shelf life to carry us through.

9. Testify — Awkwafina

No one broke into the mainstream in 2018 quite like Nora Lum, better known as Awkwafina. The woman is a bonafide triple threat of comedy, acting, and music: Queens’ Childish Gambino.

During the summer she dominated the box office with roles in Ocean’s 8 and Crazy Rich Asians, almost sneaking her EP In Fina We Trust under the radar. The track “Testify” is her vision board, the prophecy of her own well-earned trajectory. I can’t wait to see where she goes next.

8. Unconditional Love — Real Friends

Real Friends care about their posture.

No. Seriously. The band encourages fans to call them out for slouching. It’s a whole thing.

That said, is there a more “stand-up” (sorry) band in pop punk right now than Real Friends? The five guys from Illinois look like they’re having more fun than anyone making music right now, genuinely appreciative for the opportunity to create.

“Unconditional Love,” as well as the more front-facing songs on Composure, “From The Outside” and “Smiling On The Surface,” capture the genre at its essence — heartache packaged with hope, a mocktail of mighty feelings and messy hair.

Next up for Real Friends is the 8123 Fest hosted by The Maine this January. If you find yourself in Phoenix this winter, check it out. And send me video, because air travel ain’t cheap.

7. Getting Down the Germs — Gerard Way

It’s hard to believe it’s been more than four years since Gerard Way released Hesitant Alien, and nearly a decade since My Chemical Romance last released a full album. The former frontman of the 00’s defining emo band transitioned his artistic energy to comics, including the continuation of Umbrella Academy with Gabriel Bá, now being developed as a Netflix original series. In the meantime, we have had nothing to go on for music aside from the occasional MCR reunion rumor. However, at an Umbrella Academy panel at New York Comic Con, Gerard mentioned that Fridays had become his days to play around with sound again, dropping a surprise and appropriately spooky single “Baby, You’re A Haunted House” just ahead of Halloween, followed shortly by “Getting Down the Germs.”

On Instagram, Gerard writes “It’s about a few different things. Grey Lights, squirmy worming wiggly worms. Germs. It has a flute. I love the flute. I have always wanted a song with flute in it. And so this exists.”

I, for one, am glad 2018 didn’t end before I had a new impressive flute solo in my life.

6. Pink Champagne — Kitten

I always reserve a spot on the list for the best live performance I saw during the year. Without a doubt, that honor goes to Kitten, and the band’s glam-rock lead vocalist Chloe Chaidez — the kind of woman with the balls to cut her own bangs before a show at Rough Trade. Braver than I will ever be.

An (opener!) set that included two Britney-inspired wardrobe changes, a second-floor stage dive, and a six minute outro jam session that brought Chloe behind the drums, was at its best during the performance of “Pink Champagne.” Trumpeter Spencer Ludwig, who’s played with Portugal. The Man, RAC, and Foster the People, among other top-tier alt acts, made a guest appearance to bring a brassy overtone to the Benatar-esque beat. It was my sixth show in two weeks and I was starting to burn out, until Kitten stoked a fire that still has me buzzing seven months later.

Here’s a sip of “Pink Champagne” from Chloe, Spencer, bassist Blu DeTiger, and the gang. I’m desperate to know what a full-blown headliner would look like for this band. 2019, please fulfill this dream.

5. Fade Out — James Bay

“Tell me what this is for you
’Cause you only text me after 2
I wanna just be done with you
But I call you back ’cause I’m a fool
Come get me when your promises come true
Until then I’ll keep driving out to you”

A song about a thirst text is the sexiest release of 2018. Fitting.

James Bay swung left when he could have swung right in his follow-up to 2014’s Chaos and the Calm. Instead of doubling down on soft rock love songs, he delivered a funky, rhythmic (like, a specific kind of rhythmic) track about futile modern romance. The apathy can be felt beyond the one-way text conversation the subject has before making his way across town, and you’re forced to ask — does he really think this is worth it?

Maybe “Fade Out” makes my list because I could relate during my own 2018, but man, that’s a story for another day.

4. Crippling Self-Doubt And A General Lack of Confidence — Courtney Barnett

Speaking of my personal 2018!

And also speaking of the theory of rock music’s demise, Adam Levine and other short-sighted guitar “rockers” worried about the livelihood of the genre clearly haven’t been paying attention to the women down under. Courtney Barnett, along with other Australian acts like The Preatures and Camp Cope, have been perfectly packaging the anxiety of an extroverted-introvert existence in neat, 2–3 minute rock pop vignettes. The too-real “Crippling Self-Doubt…” comes with the mantra of my own female experience: “I don’t owe, I don’t owe anything; I don’t know, I don’t know anything.” The song asks — begs, really, in its sing-songy bounciness — for the subject to give an honest assessment of how they’re feeling in return. The lack of response feeds the titular anxiety, and the cycle continues.

3. Sincerity is Scary — The 1975

Keeping the “Too Real” train rolling right along this year is The 1975 — the 2010’s most 1980’s band.

“Sincerity is Scary” answers “Crippling Self-Doubt…’s” question, albeit nihilistically. When we don’t feel like we really know anything, particularly how to cope with our own sincerity in a Twitter-driven social narrative, we dive into a toxic pool of cynicism and ingenuity — too often at the expense of openness. Writer Matty Healy calls that habit — and his own abuse of it — into examination.

The choral element of the song gives it a gospel feel, the Church of Irony congregating on the social internet. The muted horns contradict how modern and digital this experience really is. The song is a perfect fit on A Brief Inquiry Into Online Relationships — an album I was anticipating so much that I put off making this list until it came out.

The trio of “Fade Out,” “Crippling Self-Doubt…” and “Sincerity…” share a storyline told from different tempos about not only suffocating under our own insecurities, but using that existential dread as an excuse to disengage and react with flippancy. There is a lot of “I can’t,” “I won’t” and “I don’t” in these tracks. The 1975 punches it up to 11 by addressing the defeatism, and our natural inclination to issue our defense mechanisms, head-on.

It’s not unlike what I do at the top of this article. Take the things that are real, sometimes “too real,” and distill them into quippy, hyberbolic and, ultimately, useless commentary. The music isn’t critical on how we got here. These songs simply establish a theme for 2018 and suggest that, perhaps, we leave it behind.

2. Bastardizer — Foxing

My favorite thing about Foxing is they call themselves an emo band, meaning stuck-up, middle-aged rock critics have to swallow the fact that they love an emo band. I mean, the website doesn’t lie.

And, man, do critics love Foxing. Writers from UpRoxx, The Alternative and even Pitchfork had to put their continued “is rock dead?” clickbait aside to admire the masterpiece of Nearer My God.

“Bastardizer,” nestled as Track #9 between the amazingly-named “Trapped in Dillard’s” and “Crown Candy,” best represents the band’s adopted genre, despite the bagpipes that give it its distinct sound. Guitarist/writer Eric Hudson and lead singer Conor Murphy collaborated with the album’s producer, Chris Walla, formerly of Death Cab for Cutie, to marry raw, angsty lyrics with the Scottish traditional instrumentation. It’s the most mature emo has ever sounded, but it’s still emo to the core. After all, Hudson himself says “this is a song for anyone who’s had a piece of shit stepdad.”

1. Bite the Hand — boygenius (Julien Baker, Phoebe Bridgers, Lucy Dacus)

In late October, when New York officially flipped the switch and embraced fall, churning the air into a blustery, low-40s average that nicked the nostrils like menthol, the most autumnal thing happened. Indie Music Darlings Julien Baker, Phoebe Bridgers, and Lucy Dacus joined forces and shared a joint EP called boygenius. The cloudy emotions made clear through the group’s collective haunting vocals and ghostly guitars feel like the echo of the season, a perfect soundtrack to pair with the tick-tick-tick of the apartment radiator kicking back on after months of rest.

The EP starts off with “Bite the Hand” — a contrite dismissal of soon-to-be-former love. The song crescendos almost without notice before taking a breath, allowing for an acapella ending that really gives all three women a chance to shine, repeating in harmony the same dispirited motif we’ve seen before: I can’t love you how you want me to.

Which brings us back to the can’ts, won’ts and don’ts. Music has always dealt with how “authentic” we feel we can be around each other, which includes being open about what we believe ourselves to be capable of. But songs like “Bite the Hand” and others here zero in on how sometimes it seems our sincerity, or lack thereof, is our ultimate weakness. When things are getting too real — whether in relationships, in our minds, or in culture at large — how we react says a lot about ourselves.

Here is a playlist of my top 2018 tracks, including a handful of honorable mentions I shout out below:

Honorable Mentions:

Full Control — Snail Mail: It physically pained me to leave this off my top ten. 2018 really was a showcase of phenomenal young women with impeccable writing. Full Control is just one track off Lush that blew me away and earned Lindsey Jordan aka Snail Mail a deserved spot in the sun.

The Good Side — Troye Sivan: Troye is my favorite thing in pop music right now, exemplifying what it means to “live your best life.” The Good Side tells the often forgotten story of the “winner” in a breakup with the distant echo of a heartbeat and an apology letter.

Dying in LA — Panic! At the Disco: Brendon Urie’s time on Broadway in the summer of 2017 clearly played a significant role in this record. The already-theatrical writer and performer leaned fully in to the modern showtune, most evidently on this hopeful-despite-it-all piano ballad.

I Like That — Janelle Monáe: Monáe talks the listener through a preteen experience about the cruelty of not meeting the status quo in this declaration of self-appreciation and, frankly, not giving a damn about who you are and who you love.

NFWMB — Hozier: Dig in and learn what the acronym stands for in this post-apocalyptic hymn. You’re welcome.