On Giancarlo Abrahan’s Paki

“Nang ma-inlove ako sa’yo kala ko’y pag-ibig mo ay tunay.”

- Salbakuta, “Stupid Love”

Gian Carlo Abrahan’s follow up to Dagitab (2014) is a familial drama that revolves around the matriarchal figure, Alejandra (Dexter Doria) and her looming separation from her husband of 50 years Uro (Noel Trinidad) and the fallout that comes with it. The film starts with an epigraph, an excerpt from Edith Tiempo’s poem Bonsai.

All that I love?
Why, yes, but for the moment —
And for all time, both.

At first glance it may seem that the poem serves as a literary summation of the fleeting nature of love and its relation with the falling out of Alejandra and Uro. While apt, let’s harken back to the film’s title: Paki. Paki in Filipino means both “please” and “care”. The two meanings, when seen within the context of the film should not be considered as separate, but rather as one. “Please” is a word that is uttered when one is asking for something and “care” is the feeling of concern or to look after someone. Love is both innate and a constant choice — for the moment and for all time.

The themes of love in relation to choice, to moments, to eternities is reflected in the film by the relationships of the characters with Alejandra as the catalyst. Alejandra and her family (composed of Uro, her four adult children, and her grandchildren) represent the love for all time, innate love, love by default. Raymond (Miguel Valdes), Alejandra’s grandson, is an example of this as he rarely interacts with his grandmother, but when the two reunite it is as if they were never apart. Only three of her children appear on screen. We never see her 4th child, Marco, as he has been gone since the day he was involved in an accident that resulted in the death of one of Alejandra’s grandchildren. Despite his absence, love is still present. This is shown through a question in which Alejandra asks “Meron kang dating asawa, pwede mo din bang sabihin dating anak?”. While it is posed as a question, her delivery and the way the film unfolds says otherwise. Loving in moments is shown through Uro’s infidelity. Midway through the film it is revealed that one of Uro’s mistresses, whom he has two children with, has died and in a throwaway statement Alejandra acknowledges that Uro really did love her. Lastly, love in relation to choice is seen between the relationship of Alejandra and Uro. Despite all that has happened, Alejandra clearly still chooses to love Uro. This is seen in one of the last scenes, a karaoke scene where Uro seemingly feels the weight of all that he has done and proceeds to breakdown in tears while the others continue singing Alejandra approaches him and comforts him.

“All the goods I’ve done wala man lang rekognition”, is a line from Salbakuta’s song Stupid Love. Love is foolish. “I am mad to be in love, I am not mad to be able to say so, I double my image: insane in my own eyes (I know my delirium), simply unreasonable in the eyes of someone else, to whom I quite sanely describe my madness: conscious of this madness, sustaining a discourse upon it” is an excerpt from Roland Barthes’ A Lover’s Discourse. Love is mad. “At the end of my life I must stagger back to love,” is a line from Eric Gamalinda’s poem DMZ. Love is where we will all stagger back to.