I found my personal meaning for life.

But I’m scared of showing it to the world.

Why?

Because I think people will shoot it down or come up with counterarguments for why it’s invalid.

Or maybe it’s me telling that to myself.

It could be just me standing in the way of something greater.

Maybe it’s Resistance, like they say in The War of Art.

But what I’ve synthesized from reading books about the meaning of life and such is that people often get caught up thinking about what they’re doing rather than living for the sake of living.

When your action and your desired state of being coincide, when you act according to the value system you hold, perhaps that’s where you find joy and fulfillment.

One of my friends said he thought the meaning of life was making existence a little less miserable for other people. Easing the burden on others even just a little bit, so that life was more bearable.

That’s a very utilitarian way to look at it.

I guess the view I hold is an ableist view.

When you view everything through the lens of capabilities and such, then where does that leave those who are disabled?

I’m still not sure. Still trying to figure it out.

But I’ll keep my personal meaning of life to myself and refine it as the years ago by.