Twitter Adds Edit Button To Entire Company

In a shocking move Twitter finally added a much requested feature, taking it even further than anyone expected. The edit button has now been added to the Twitter web interface but instead of editing tweets it allows users to edit the entire company. Twitter CEO Jack Dorsey applauded this large effort “We’re now able to give the users what they want, by letting them pretty much do anything.”

The first swift addition was improvements to the harassment policy. Those who had been forever stalked by a large army of egg icons talking nonsense are now able to make them just go away. Hiring policies were updated to help diversify the staff. Technical features added included an auto-scrolling timeline, basic filters, working official clients for all platforms, and actually showing what client a tweet was made from. We’ll update this story with more information when finished implementing the break dancing cat gif functionality.

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