We, Who Are Not As Others. (4/30)
A couple of years ago a friend asked me during a coffee hangout “Do you ever get tired of being so authentic?” The question took me by surprise. I have never thought about that. Is being authentic such an unusual thing that it makes people wonder about its’ authenticity (see what I did here? :) ) ?
Hello! Welcome back! If you’re new here, please take a seat in the front row. Everybody grabbed their tea? Ok. Let’s go.
Today I pick authenticity, due to some discussions I had over the past couple of days due to what I write. I have been asked why don’t I share more of my professional experience instead of telling personal stories, since a lot of the people reading these articles don’t know me, and I do have a lot of experience, especially in the tech startup world and building communities. So I wondered myself why, indeed?
The truth is that I have done a lot of different things in my professional life. I started working when I was 18, and worked while also studying to get my license diploma in international relations focused on managerial marketing and then my associated degree in graphic & web design.
I was a model (for like 2 seconds…), logistics assistant, secretary, PR assistant. Then I moved to US and started from scratch by working as a receptionist in an architectural steel factory. I did other jobs too, but I’m not going to waste your time. Fact is, whatever I did and whatever job I had, I always tried to understand the basic principles of what makes it tick and that led me to become really good at whatever I was doing, to the point that the overall efficiency of my employing company would rise considerably. When there was nothing challenging left or I felt I can’t contribute to the further development, I would move on and let others replace me. Different perspectives aways shake things up! ;) (we could go into an AI discussion here, but let’s move on). However, I was always unsatisfied with having just a “job”…
Eventually I started freelancing and donating my time to a human rights organisation in Washington DC., mostly because I thought its founder is one of the most inspirational and authentic humans I’ve met.
One led to another, and I was recommended to an organisation that needed help with their website redesign.
I ended up working for them for 3.5 years, moving from just redesigning their site to website & server administration, fixing wordpress bugs and removing viruses from their database to managing regional operations for CEE and then running business development for whole of Europe. Here I was, from an introverted shy designer becoming a passionate evangelist of the startup mentality and way of life. And I did good! And why I did good was because I truly believed in the mission of the organisation and really liked its founders and what they were fighting to achieve and I was so enthusiastic and dedicated to it that I ended up having a pretty big impact and I built really strong global connections. It felt authentic. It matched my core.
This is important, and I think more people should talk about it:
What you try to accomplish through your work should always match what you truly believe in to be right.
I have always advised people to follow their passion. I have been called “silly” or “idealistic” on different occasions by money-driven characters, but I always figured they are like that because they have never known what true passion for changing the world feels like. I feel sad for people whose “favourite colour is money”, that’s just very very sad to me, because there’s so much more to life! But we are not all the same. We are not all meant to be happy. Some of us will only live for profit, and others will live to shake things up and try to change the world. I choose to be part of the latter.
There are many articles published these days that contain lists with how to do this and that, rules and processes and practices. I personally believe that all those things are variables! Yes, you can get inspired, but if you do not try to adapt processes and concepts to your company’s authentic context, you will lose. Authenticity is good not just for your soul and for your personal happiness, but also for your company!
I really believe that we are born with the potential to achieve anything. You can get good at anything you set your mind to, as long as that anything is driven by passion and authenticity. If you’re not getting good at something, it means you’re doing it for the wrong reasons, and you should look deep down inside and search self-honesty.
I have worked on amazing projects, with amazing companies and I have a lot of experience, especially in the tech startup world — I have worked on both the entrepreneurs and VC side of the table, seen hundreds of pitches and heard thousands of ideas. But I only remember the ones that came from the heart of their founders, the ones that were built on strong principles and had good impact on the future development of humanity. I am sure you are the same — you remember the things you most connect with deep down, on an unconscious level.
This is why I don’t usually recommend startups, but when I do it’s the ones whose potential I truly believe in. This is why I don’t ask about monetisation when I am on juries or panels. Product validation is important, but have you walked into one of those 1$ stores? They are profitable… Products come and go, ideas come and go, money come and go.
Authenticity should always come first, and if you build on it, you will always find others that relate to your core and become your long-term community instead of just a temporary user of your product or service.
So I am not making lists. I am not writing community tutorials, because I don’t think same tactics apply to different communities, products, companies. I like innovation, therefore I look to inspire, not instruct. I am a a better leader than manager. And I want you to hear my learnings, hopefully connect with your core authenticity and go be you, the real you!
We don’t talk enough about our humanity and our needs and failures, and when someone shares that, we ask in amazement “Do you ever get tired of being authentic?” We think we should only share our strengths, instead of the struggles that developed our strengths. We treat depression as a mental illness instead of an opportunity to help. We talk about work more than we talk about ourselves. So how about we remove the line that separates them, and start paying attention to the people behind the work? Because really, that’s how you build communities — via authentic connections.
And no. I don’t get tired of being authentic. It’s who I am, and I’m proud of myself.
Until tomorrow.
This piece is part of the 30 Days Writing Challenge. During the next month I will write short stories about whatever is on my mind each day! Thank you for reading them, I hope they’ll inspire you! :)
