Titles are the Hardest
I would say that this post is going to be about how I love writing and how I’ve learned so much about myself through writing, but that’s not quite true. I’m not sure how to title this post, so I just had to be a clever and be a little shit.
How is it that I can see myself coming so far and loving the change I’ve made, but also look back and thinking the me two years ago was so wise? Seeing the me two years ago write about how people don’t “need to be needed” makes me so fucking in awe in the confidence I had in myself and the world. The past me that linked a post that I have completely forgotten about, but I realized needed it so much at this current moment.
I have become one of those people I used to laugh at. The people who are insecure about themselves and uncertain about the world. I have also spent the last few days laughing at my past self — for being so desperate to leave, for looking forward to the future, trusting that the future is good when I’ve barely done anything.
And I guess this is it. We’re constantly laughing at ourselves.
The past me is an idiot. The current me is an idiot. And no doubt, the future me will be an idiot.
There’s no ‘but as long as you’re happy’ in this post, because I know even more so now ignorance is bliss. Yet, I definitely want to learn more about the world and who I can be. I still have so much faith in the world, because I have found some of my soulmates (honestly though, who knows if these can last forever).
I’ll take the pain and the discomfort. I don’t have a dream of what I want to do like I did when I was 16, but I have faith in the universe. I don’t know for what, but I do.