Dreams.

I always had a problem answering the « What do you dream of?” question, because I was raised in a society that doesn’t believe in dreams.
So I learned to keep quiet whenever I was asked that question, to avoid others mockery, and the you’re-too-far-from-reality looks. Most people do not accept, or value, those who think out the box.
I learned to keep my dreams and my thoughts for myself, I rarely let anyone into the world buzzing inside my head.
I was raised on silence, but this may be time to speak up. I’m going to raise my voice and say “that’s who I truly am, and I’m not afraid anymore of being judged as a weirdo, a mess, a dreamy… that’s simply who I am!”
Well, to start with, I should introduce myself, I don’t think names matters.. I’m just a girl with eighteen years old, leading the same ordinary life as everyone, struggling to find my place in this big great void, in the pages of a book, or in a character in some movie. I’m a girl with a head full of dreams, and sometimes they weight too much…
I dream of a world where people accept people for who they truly are, a world where poor people, people with physical handicaps, or suffering from mental problems, or just those who think differently, those who decided to leave the flock, are not judged and rejected. Why is it so hard to accept someone who’s different? What’s our definition for “normal” and “different”?!!
I dream of a much colorful life, where the main goal is ‘happiness’ and not ‘to earn as much money as you can’. Money does not buy happiness, does it? I remember saying this to one of my teachers, I was laughed at… what’s the point of having a good job, that pleases everyone but you, a job you hate! I, personally, don’t dream of having what’s people call today the perfect job, a doctor or an engineer. I dream of having a job I love, no matter how much salary it provides. I want to work with passion, I want to look at my life proudly when I grow up and say “I MADE IT”! I want to live a life I created, not a life that’s already planned by others, the thought of following the same path, which was made for everyone, shocks me. Does anyone else notice the chains on our necks made by our society ? Does anyone notice that we’re blindly following each other, without knowing the destination?
I dream of becoming a writer, I want to write novels. I dream of seeing my name printed on a book’s cover
I dream of having my own library, a big one, a very big one! Books have always sheltered me, it’s more than paper and ink, it’s a whole other world, it’s having another life, and taking a break from the monotorious reality…
I dream of not being called a nerd, whenever someone sees a book in my hands, I’m a bookworm, I can’t help it!
I dream of assisting musical concerts, rock concerts. I dream of meeting the imagine dragon’s or the breaking Benjamin’s members. I want to thank them for the music that got me through my dark days. Music is oxygen, life would be unbearable without it!
I dream of travelling the world, I want to discover the beauty of life, because I can’t see any in here… I dream of endless trips to deserts, beaches, forests… I want to look for my missing parts in nature, I’ve always felt so incomplete, so un-belonged to people. Maybe I belong to nature, maybe it is the home I’m looking for…
I dream of spending nights under the stars, I dream of being in a calm place, where nothing can be heard but bird’s melodies, sitting there in complete silence, away from everything, watching sunsets and sunrises, getting high on nature perfumes…
I dream of owning a little house near the sea, a small house, and I want to share it with someone that truly loves me and cares for my little interestings and accepts my forever-changing mood, someone who can stand my flows of emotions, and my sudden coldness, I don’t want to end up with someone that barely knows me, as most people.. I dream of meeting this soulmate, who will know about the darkness inside me, but still look at me like I’m the sun, like I’m magic..
I dream of the world where people no longer die because of wars, famine, violence… a world with equal chances for all, where everyone have the same rights and duties, I dream of equality, and freedom.. I’d rather die on my feet, than live on my knees! The world we’re living in going more insane day by day, it’s drowning on blood, people kill each other for no specific reason… whose fault is this? They claim that our generation is blind. I say that’s not true! We see the truth clearly, we are aware of what’s happening, yet, we can’t make a move, we have no enough power to change this reality… I DREAM OF CHANGING THIS REALITY, I dream of saving the world, and I want badly to believe that it still can be saved. I want broken hearts to heal, I want people’s scars to fade, I want homeless to be sheltered, I want lonely and depressed people to know that they’re not alone, I want for the amount of misery and sadness we consume everyday to be reduced..
I dream of happiness, true happiness, the one that worms your heart and fill your veins, the kind of happiness that give sense to your life, the one that gives you a reason for waking up in the morning, and the will to start a new day.. I want to reach this happiness (if it even exists), I want to make my own path. I’m sick of being told what I should do, who I should be, I want to feel like I’m ‘the one at the sail, the master of my sea’…
I dream of not being afraid to dream, I want to stop being afraid to break my own heart by setting high goals, by wishing too much, by expecting too much… What most terrifies me is growing up and becoming another copy, well-educated, brilliantly promising, useless and empty women… I want to reach the truth, I want to know why and how, I want to give my existence a meaning, and I want to know how to not feel horribly useless, paralyzed…
