How To Last Longer In Bed For Men (At Least 30 Mins EASILY)
I've been there, premature ejaculation was something of a nightmare in my own life, but I fixed it and so can you!
This is the only guide you will need to read on how to last longer in bed for men!
Have you ever wondered how do pornstars last so long?
After you're done, you'll know exactly how to prepare yourself to last longer and how to control yourself better during the sex as well…
There are lots of ninja tricks that I'll share with you!
Let's get to it:
Article consists of four parts:
- Intercourse Doesn’t Need To Be The Main Course
- Exercises To Do Before Having Sex To Increase Your Stamina
- Tips & Techniques To Do To Last Longer During Sex
- Bonus: Other Men Advice and Perspective On Lasting Longer
Part 1: Intercourse Doesn’t Need To Be The Main Course
Most of the guys who think they have problems lasting longer… don’t.
Guys think that they need to do one hour of crazy pounding intercourse to be great lovers. But this just isn’t true.
Most women you’ll meet actually wouldn’t even be able to take 1 hour of constant sex. If you can consistently last more than 10 minutes of actual intercourse, your woman will be happy. If you last for 20 minutes she will brag about you and will feel sore in the morning.
Making love can easily last for an hour or two, but it doesn’t need to be actual intercourse!
One of the greatest sex myths is that it needs to be penetrative.
Don’t let your penis hardness be the focus of the sex. You don’t need to be hard all the time during the process, so don’t make it a priority.
If you just prolong the foreplay and follow the steps outlined in my orgasm giving article, you’ll never have problems in this department.
Part 2: Exercises To Do Before Having Sex To Increase Your Stamina
#1 — STOP The Bad Jerking Off Habits
One of the main reasons men have problems with Erectile Dysfunction (ED) or Premature Ejaculation (PE) is because of lousy masturbation habits.
When you will stop the porn in a few weeks you’ll notice how attractive and sexy girls in real life become. Your sex life will be transformed with this one thing.
However, if your issue is PE, that probably comes from earlier years when privacy was an issue. So when you did masturbate you did it as quickly as possible to avoid getting caught, that you developed a bad habit.
How can you expect yourself to last longer, if you can never last longer than a few minutes even by yourself?
The answer to this issue is practice and we’ll get to it soon.
But the first step to change is awareness.
#2 — Get Fit & Fix Your Health
Being fit can make an immense improvement to your abilities (plus, the side benefit of being more attractive to women).
Remember, when your penis gets hard when the blood vessels open up and fill with blood. And this, in turn, is closely affected by your cardiovascular shape.
Any exercise that will keep your heart rate elevated for at least 30 minutes, at least 3x/week will make a significant difference.
You’ll notice how you can stay physically active for longer. Plus your metabolism will improve. This includes blood circulation to your heart, lungs and — most importantly — your penis.
Also, it’s not only about the exercise — if you smoke, drink and eat junk food — your sexual drive will be affected as well..!
Start making better health choices and not only your love life will improve, but overall life as well.
#3 — Strengthen Your PC muscles — Kegel Exercises
OK, so you are training your overall body.
Did you know you can also train your penis control muscles?
Yes, you can learn to control your penis hardness levels and eventually even be able to achieve non-ejaculatory orgasms with a help of this practice.
Maybe you’ve heard of PC muscle training, Kegel exercise or Male Deer exercise. It’s real and it helps incredibly with your self-control in bed.
Here’s how you do the exercise:
- First, you need to learn to isolate your PC muscle. It’s the muscle you use to stop peeing. That’s actually a great time to start your kegel exercise.
- Every time you go to take a leak, stop yourself for 5 x 10 secs by squeezing your PC muscle as strong as you can. Then release.
- A leak taking time is a nice trigger to be able to do the exercise regularly. In about 2 weeks you’ll start noticing a significant difference in your control.
- Start by squeezing PC muscle for few seconds and then releasing. Over time you can increase the duration. The great thing is that you can also do the exercise anywhere — while driving, sitting at your desk, while having lunch… nobody will know.
- You can also do a mix of 30 quick squeezes and releases, follow it by 10x5secs holding the flex and repeat this for 5 times. It shouldn’t take you more than 10 mins a day.
#4 — Practice Controlling Yourself With Edging
Yep, we are still by ourselves, but this is the last step.
Instead of porn or quick wank, you need to learn how to masturbate by yourself for longer.
It would sound hard if it wouldn’t be the most pleasurable exercise ever!
Here’s a rule though: You are not allowed to ejaculate in less than 15 minutes (and no porn).
Ideally, you would not ejaculate at all. The more you save your semen, the more energy you’ll gain. (read more about it here). I shared my own 99 day nofap challenge experience there.
You need to stop outsourcing your stimulation to porn. Is there any wonder that after seeing endless tabs of sexy, exciting scenes you have trouble getting hard for your girl?
On the other side, is there any surprise that you can’t last for long if your masturbation has never lasted longer than 3 minutes?
Okay, now what do you do during these 15 minutes?
You’ll practice edging.
Remember that kegel exercise? This is where it comes to play.
What you’ll do is you get yourself hard, get close to ejaculation and squeeze your PC muscle as hard as possible and hold it for 10 seconds.
While you are squeezing practice deep, relaxed breathing. It helps to imagine moving the sexual energy from your penis area to your whole body with each breath.
The key to this exercise is to learn to control yourself as well as being aware of your hardness levels.
It’s helpful to keep asking yourself during different arousal stages: “From 1 to 10 at which stage am I?
This will allow yourself to push the limits and also you’ll learn about your own “Point of No-Return”.
For example, during the sex, you’ll know when you need to slow down and for how long you need to squeeze your PC muscles to calm down.
Part 3: Tips & Techniques To Do To Last Longer During Sex
#5 — Make Her Orgasm First
As you learned in the beginning — intercourse doesn’t need to be the main play!
A good rule to have is to always make sure she comes first.
Here's a great video I made on my best pussy eating tips:
This will only remove the pressure and arouse both of you at the same time.
You cannot go wrong with this rule! From now on, think of intercourse as 30% of the lovemaking process.
70% of it can be kissing, cuddling, fingering, giving her cunnilingus or receiving fellatio!
Slow things down and tease each other for longer. This will only build the tension, increase the pleasure, and orgasms will be so much more intense.
He covers in detail how to make girls have multiple orgasms, “squirting” orgasms, and heck — even stacking orgasms!
I’m still learning that stuff heh!
#6 — Communicate With Her To Fix Your Anxiety
One of the biggest arousal killers is stress. Think about it.
When you masturbate by yourself are you stressed?
No! You’re super relaxed!
How can you then expect yourself to stay hard and excited if you are worried about your performance? All those thoughts in your mind are toxic.
But here are some news — girls have the same anxiety issues! They just worry about things like — oh, does he find me attractive..? Are my breasts too small? I hope it doesn’t smell down there…
The #1 fix to this is communication. Talk to your partner.
Discuss your worries beforehand and it will help her to open up and calm down as well. If things go wrong during the sex, you can also just be honest and tell what’s going on.
Maybe you won’t fix your challenges the first time, but your sex WILL improve over time!
7. The “Drinking Her In” Technique
One cool trick to reduce stress or stop yourself from cumming too soon is to change the focus.
Instead of focusing on your own hardness, pleasure or just her pussy or breasts — DRINK ALL OF HER IN.
Notice how your touch is affecting her, look deeply in her eyes, appreciate her curly hair.
Activate all your senses and notice what gives her pleasure. Try to experience her pleasure through you.
When you do this, the pressure will stop, your presence and enjoyment will increase. Your lovemaking will resemble a mini-tantric experience.
Your woman will love this and you’ll be able to last much longer!
8. Switch Positions & Mix Things Up
As you learn how your body works, you’ll also discover that there are some positions that make you cum sooner and some that make you less aroused.
Use this knowledge to your advantage..!
If you are finding yourself to get too close to ejaculation, switch positions!
Change the tempo, angle — make the sex feel totally different.
Also, there is no rule, that once you’ve penetrated her, that you have to stay inside. Actually, it can be a lot of fun to thrust her for a few times, then withdraw and use your fingers to keep going.
Teasing her this way will only increase the intensity of the pleasure. Plus, did you know that you can edge your girl too? Yep, that’s right!
If you want to achieve squirting or whole body orgasms, you actually keep teasing her to 9 (1 to 10 intensity) and then stopping.
When you’ll eventually bring her to climax, she’ll have a mind-blowing orgasm!
Plus, by mixing it up and making it fun you’ll be able to last much longer ;)
9. Practice Deep, Relaxed Breathing
If you observe yourself, you’ll notice that right before you ejaculate your breath actually becomes shorter and shorter until you hold your breath at the moment of cumming.
Knowing this you can calm yourself down with long, deep breathing through the diaphragm.
As I mentioned before, if you practice this during your masturbation sessions, it will get easier and easier to control yourself during the process.
Mute the sensation away from your penis, focus on the sound of your breath and you’ll be able to calm down.
10. Use a Thick Condom and Lube
This is a simple one. There are condoms that are thicker than others for example, Lifestyles Extra Strength.
Use them to your advantage. If you have trouble lasting longer, pick a thicker condom. If you have trouble staying hard, use something super light like Lifestyles Skyn.
Also, you may have noticed when it’s super wet down there, you can last longer and sensations lessen.
Well, use lots of your own saliva and lube and you’ll last longer!
11. Bring in The Backup (Sex Toys)
Finally, if you find yourself working too hard, why not make it easier?
Get some sex toys to help you out..!
A simple bullet vibrator for $8 will do the job splendidly! No need to shell out hundreds of dollars for expensive sex toys.
A lot of guys worry that bringing such toys will make them a less of a man. But this is so false, no toy can replace a man and sensations you can bring with your magic touch, masculine energy, and passionate kisses (ask any woman!).
So destroy your limiting beliefs and start having more fun!
Bonus: Other Men Advice and Perspective On Lasting Longer
Obviously this is just a one man's perspective…and even if I've talked to a ton of men to uncover the best lasting longer techniques, it does help to add extra voices, right?
So here are 5 men giving advice based on their personal experiences!
#1 — What are some of your tricks in bed to last longer?
“For me it’s breath control.
Focusing on breathing slowly through my nose lets me go pretty much as long as I want.
When I want to start finishing up I start breathing through my mouth and not really paying attention to controlling it anymore.
Slow breathing + slow strokes when I feel myself approaching climax helps to calm me back down.”
#2 — [Pro Tip] When you’re about to cum early, think of words that rhyme or count backwards from 100 in sevens. You’ll last longer.
“Engaging the logic part of your brain shifts blood-flow away from your emotional centers and helps you maintain your composure.
I read this in the book “Moody Bitches” by Julie Holland, if that’s relevant.”
#3 — An old recipe for training yourself to last longer
This a goldmine of cool ideas to last longer kheh!
Read and practice!
“I learned about this technique when I was dating a girl and couldn’t last a minute with her.
Too much physical and emotional attraction. I tried everything but to no avail. I even bought some weird mint gel that was supposed to numb the feeling but it left me literally without any feeling and was horrible.
After some months there was absolutely no improvement and it was beginning to be an issue for her.
While I was at one of my dad’s grill parties one of his friends (a specialist in gynecologic oncology) asked me if I’m having “girl trouble”.
To my surprise in my desperation I was completely sincere and told him about it. Told him I tried the most known stuff but it just didn’t help. This was his advice.
He held trying to trick your brain with thinking about something else for very wrong as it degraded the act of sex. (a more extended version mixed with some of the experience I have now)
You have to be 100% concentrated to be able to enjoy, “harvest”, and deliver great sex.
First and foremost practice makes perfect. Like anything else in life you have to train yourself. Don’t be lazy, training will make you whatever you want to be.
Have as much sex as you can.
Don’t fight your libido, use it.
If you finish way too early — forget about it and start again in 15 minutes. And again. And again. As long as she doesn’t mind and helps you get hard again, stay on it.
Best way to learn control is trying to interrupt your orgasm building in the last possible moment.
The more you do it the more you will extend (control) it and will be able to enjoy that building up longer.
Right before an orgasm the penis also becomes harder and if you could hold that over longer periods you’re going to unleash your potential. Interrupting sex all the time doesn’t seem good but you can do it in a sexy way.
Be creative you can interrupt to change a pose. You don’t need to hide it — you could pull out and rumble in pleasure, girls will appreciate feedback on how much you like them.
Sometimes you see guys in porn gently slapping their dick on her ass/thigh.
That’s a good technique to faster come down from the high build up.
A much much better (and less weird to some women) technique is grabbing the top of your penis just before the tip and gently pushing the back of the head (direct on top of the urethral orifice) down with your thumb.
That immediately releases pressure and you can start working up again before she loses her build up.
Interrupting isn’t great for the partner but it’s better than awkward 90 seconds, and it gets better.
After some time your body and mind will learn and you won’t need to interrupt.
You can practice the thumb technique while masturbating. Masturbate and just before ejaculation push the tip around the urethral orifice down, as if you’re using a mouth spray.
You can do that a lot, 5–10 times a session. It’s hard but I was able to extend sex to 15–20 minutes in just a few long interruption masturbation sessions.
If you also not come after one of those sessions it will also get your testosterone boiling but that could also make you more aggressive. Experiment.
I am glad I was told this technique at the time because I was able to not only have normal length sex but also get her to orgasm.
Everything in just a couple of months. It was some of the most amazing exciting sex I’ve ever had!
TL;DR: Interrupting right just before you orgasm will help you control and last longer. “
#4 — How Exactly to Stop Yourself from Cumming Using Kegels
Another great guide from a guy who did make himself to last much longer using kegel exercises and he's 20 years old!
“It took me a lot of trial and error to learn how to stop myself from cumming, which is why I wrote this: so you can know exactly how to make yourself last longer without the weeks of trial and error.
I’ve been doing kegels for about three months and the effects have been insane.
But I’ve had a lot of confusion about how I use them to last longer. I mean, do you squeeze when you’re going to cum? Do they just automatically make you last longer? In all the articles I read on them, it didn’t really say.
I believed that you were supposed to squeeze, but no matter how hard I squeezed, I still came, and I tried a million times to stop myself! Everyone is different, and maybe that will work for some people, but it definitely doesn’t work for me.
Maybe after a year or so of doing them I’ll be able to stop by squeezing, but I didn’t have to wait a year to stop myself because there’s a better way.
The muscle in your pelvic floor tightens and tightens during sex until it spasms and you cum.
So, if anything, squeezing makes you come faster. Plus, I don’t think squeezing during sex is very comfortable or enjoyable.
It’s like you’re killing yourself by squeezing as hard as you can during something that’s supposed to be enjoyable.
I found out the only way I can stop myself from finishing is by relaxing. Kegels increase the mind-body connection to your pelvic floor, so now I have total control of relaxing.
I just stop myself from reaching the point of no return AND IT FEELS REALLY GOOD.
It’s not this throbbing, aching pleasure, it’s a delicate, long lasting pleasure.
My erection even gets harder. Somehow by switching from tight to relaxed, it allows more blood and I get harder. Weird, no?
So, in summary, kegels allow me relax before entering the point of no return.
How long until I can stop myself?
I think that after just a few days you’ll be able to last a little longer. There’s no telling how long it will take before you can last as long as you want, but it would have taken me less than three months had I known what it takes to stop myself.
A LITTLE BACKGROUND: I’m just a 20 year old guy, I like to exercise a lot and I’m a hopeless romantic and stuff.
Kegels have been amazing. I can come like five times in one session with only a couple minutes of recovery time.
They made me way hornier, though, which I feel is only half a good thing. It’s like, “Jesus, penis! I have other stuff I have to do”
Any input you have is appreciated, and if you have any question, just ask. I’ll answer in the comments.
Oh, also, kegels are just a nice trick for in bed. If you really want to be a sex god, read this.
The best book I’ve ever read on sex is “She Comes First” — the only book you'll need to read on pleasuring her.
Wow! I totally forgot to mention the reverse kegel and my routine!
Yes, I don’t have to think about something else.
God, that would be so not sexy. I just tell my pelvic floor to calm the fuck down and it does.
Haha. I just unflex it, and maybe if it needs a little help I do a reverse kegel and it relaxes immediately if I haven’t gone past the point of no return.
And this is my routine by the way.
I had worked up to 30 minute sessions each day, but I found out that caused “over-training” which caused the muscle to get weaker.
- So I only do them for 4 and a half minutes every day.
- Each rep is 30 seconds.
- The routine is squeeze, relax, push, relax, squeeze, repeat.
- Every day before I brush my teeth.
#5 — [Orgasms] My boyfriend lasts forever, I’m in pain, sex just isn’t happening. HELP!
And this is just a perspective, that it isn't healthy if the guy can last forever!
It's a manifest to the idea, that actually you don't need to last long, because actual intercourse isnt usually enjoyable for longer than 30 mins.
Mix things up instead, eat her pussy out, finger her, let her give you a blowjob… or just don't do anything — just look at each other and connect!
“Basically, sex with my boyfriend (of a little over 1yr) lasts around two hours every time.
I am at a disadvantage to begin with because I myself don’t get physical pleasure out of anything other than basically slow humping.
I do enjoy sex because I love connecting with him and making him feel great, but even that feels impossible these days.
I used to be able to do PIV and just kind of enjoy the connection but lately it hurts. Lube helps the pain but seems to make him last even longer.
I love giving head but I have TMJ and my jaw cramps up after awhile.
He just seems to hates handjobs, every time I feel I run out of options and start jerking him off he just stops responding and gives up.
We’ve tried foot play which again is fine for awhile but I just don’t have the physical stamina to keep it going long enough for him.
Writing this I feel like I’m just putting forth a long list of excuses but I really am trying very hard despite getting very little in return these days.
I also hope it doesn’t sound like my BF is selfish, he really isn’t and tries to focus on me but just nothing works and I’d prefer to just enjoy watching him get off.
He’s clearly miserable because I’ve just been avoiding sex lately but I don’t know how to make it better. “
That's it for the real people stories!
How that's for the perspective?
Bringing It All Together
Remember, practice makes perfect!
If you learn to control your body and change your focus to “Drinking Her In” — You’ll NEVER have issues with lasting longer ever again!
However, I just scratched the surface of what it takes to become an incredible lover in the bed.
Wouldn’t you want your woman to say that you are the best lover she had ever been with?
Here’s why learning how to give any woman massive sexual pleasure EVERY TIME you have sex is important to YOU…
1. It’s way more fun.
I don’t know a guy who doesn’t love getting women off, feeling her go crazy with desire, making her completely lose control, leave her spent and shaking when you’re done.
2. It builds connection, loyalty, and… love
If you want to eventually turn this entire “meeting women” thing into a real relationship, then you must know that one of the things that makes a woman say to herself, “this guy just might be the one!” is being able to rock her world in bed.
Women love to be able to tell their friends: “The first time we made love I knew this guy was special… he did things to me that no other lover was able to do”
3. It makes you more CONFIDENT in every interaction with women…
There is something about KNOWING that she is going to have an amazing experience with you sexually that changes the way you approach a woman.
A lot of men really struggle with feeling like they are trying to “get” something from a beautiful woman that they approach. But when you have the consistent experience of women becoming sexually addicted to you…
It changes things.
Suddenly your cocky smile comes from an authentic place because you know that you are offering her much more than clever conversation if she’s smart enough to date you.
Women can FEEL this.
But, heck… I probably didn’t have to convince you that being great in bed is something you’d like women to say about you…
There is a ton of useless, and even WRONG information out there about how to please women in the bedroom. A lot of it is outdated or written by women who only know what works for themselves…
It can be very difficult to sort out the good resources from the same-old-stuff.
I write more on this, a lot more!