How to Attract Older Women — Guide for Guys Interested in Mature Women

Daisy Mae
8 min readSep 29, 2024

Dating women of any age is a blast, but there’s something extra cool about older women. They’ve got that confidence and really know what they want, which can lead to some seriously amazing chemistry. Whether you’re just thinking about trying your luck with an older woman or there’s one special lady you can’t stop thinking about, you’ll need to step up your game. Being self-assured and well-put-together is key if you want to grab her attention.

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How to Attract Older Women

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Dress Respectfully

When you’re aiming to impress a woman in her 30s or 40s, you don’t need to dress like you’re her age, but you definitely don’t want to look like you just rolled out of a teenage rebellion. Here’s how to nail that balance:

  • No matter what kind of underwear you’re sporting, keep your pants pulled up.
  • Opt for button-ups or dress shirts instead of your usual casual tees.
  • Jeans are always a solid choice.
  • Skip the extreme drop-crotch pants; they’re a no-go.
  • If you’re into accessories, keep it classy — no over-the-top bling.
  • Leave the wild hairstyles behind.

Compliment Her Like She’s a Queen

Older women, just like anyone else, deal with body image stuff. Aging can mess with their confidence, and they’re often working hard to stay fit and feel sexy. Want to win her over? Shower her with genuine compliments. Don’t hold back — let her know exactly what you find attractive. And hey, some might even prefer being called “girl” instead of “woman.” Try these out:

  • “I’m the luckiest guy here because I’m with the hottest girl in the room.”
  • “Your curves look absolutely stunning in that little black dress.”
  • “You look insanely sexy in those skinny jeans!”
  • “You could totally model for Victoria’s Secret.”
  • “You’re the most gorgeous girl I’ve ever seen.”
How to make an Older Women like you

Be a Good, Not a Bad Boy

TV shows and movies love to paint cougars as women on the prowl, hitting bars for quick flings. But real life? It’s a different story. If you want to attract an older woman, ditch the bad boy act. She’s looking for a good time, not trouble, so mind your manners and be polite.

  • Stay calm and actually listen to what she’s saying — it’s a clear sign of maturity.
  • Show her that you’re well-mannered and considerate.

Keep It Cool, Not Loud

Being the loudest guy in the room might get you attention from people your age, but when it comes to older women, that macho, alpha male stuff doesn’t really fly. They appreciate a younger guy who can keep it cool. Remember, she’s not looking for the loudest voice — she’s attracted to calm confidence, not noise.

Keep Things Fun and Spontaneous — Bring Back Her Youth

As people get older, spontaneity tends to take a backseat. But if you want to catch an older woman’s eye, it’s time to shake things up and give her a taste of the fun she used to have. Be spontaneous, and do those silly, random things she probably hasn’t done in ages.

For example, why not suggest a late-night ice cream run? Something so simple can bring back that rush of excitement she hasn’t felt in a while. The more random the activity, the better — it’ll definitely get her heart racing, and she’ll love the thrill, no matter how goofy it seems.

Attract Older Women

Be a Gentleman — Show Her Chivalry Isn’t Dead

Older women, especially those who’ve been through marriages or long-term relationships, might not be too familiar with chivalry anymore. When romance fizzles out over time, a little old-fashioned gentlemanly behavior can go a long way.

Want to impress her? Flirt with her and be the perfect gentleman. Here are some ways to show you’ve got class:

  • Hold the door open for her.
  • Keep those compliments coming.
  • Pull out her chair when you sit down.
  • Stand up when she enters the room.

She’ll appreciate the effort, and it’ll remind her that romance is still very much alive.

Plan Fun Dates

Maybe she’s never tried that cool new food spot or done something a bit quirky that you love. Be the one to introduce her to these new adventures, but always make sure she’s on board and just as pumped about it as you are.

Take the Lead

She might have a few more years of experience, but don’t let that shake your confidence. Step up and make the first move — whether it’s going for that first kiss, picking a fun date spot, or letting her know how you feel. Taking the lead can be super attractive.

How to Attract Older Women

Challenges of Dating an Older Woman

So, you’ve got your game on and know how to charm an older woman. But before you jump in, let’s keep it real — there are a few unique challenges that might pop up:

1. Competing with Experienced Guys

She might have been wooed by men with more life experience or a bigger bank account. Feeling a bit out of your league? Totally normal. But hey, she’s into you for a reason. Lean into what makes you stand out. Your fresh outlook, energy, and passion can be just as attractive, if not more, than a thick wallet or some gray hairs.

2. Dealing with Past Relationships

She’s lived through some love stories, and yeah, maybe even some heartbreaks. Her past relationships might have been longer or more serious than yours. But don’t see it as baggage — think of it as a collection of life lessons. Be patient, be understanding, and remember, all those experiences have shaped the amazing woman you’re drawn to now.

3. Friends and Family Reactions

You might get a few raised eyebrows or even straight-up disapproval. Why? Age-gap relationships, even though more common these days, can still stir up some old-school attitudes. Handle it with patience and understanding. If you’re both happy and genuine about your relationship, that’s what counts.

4. Financial Differences

She’s likely been in the workforce longer and might be more financially stable than you. This can bring up questions about who’s picking up the tab for dates, vacations, or gifts. Remember, it’s not about the money — it’s about the effort and gesture. Be real with your efforts, and if things get serious, have an open chat about finances.

5. Career Success

With age often comes a stacked resume. She might have some serious career accomplishments while you’re still grinding your way up. Don’t let it intimidate you — celebrate her wins. Show genuine interest in her career journey, and let her success be something that inspires you, not something that overshadows you.

6. Different Life Stages

Depending on the age gap, you two might be in different phases of life. She could be thinking about retirement and travel, while you’re still looking at career moves or maybe more education. It’s important to communicate and make sure your life goals are on the same page for the near future.

7. Society’s Opinions

Even though society is getting better about this stuff, dating someone significantly older can still raise some eyebrows. You might get comments or unwanted advice.

How to Attract mature Women

Why Would Older Women Date Younger Partners?

When it comes to age gaps in relationships, a lot of things can come into play. For some, yeah, sex might be a factor. Older women might appreciate the extra energy a younger partner brings to the bedroom. Plus, women over 40 might enjoy having a partner who isn’t tied down by past marriages, kids, or messy divorces. But honestly, most older women end up with younger guys because they just happen to fall in love — not because they planned it that way.

On the flip side, some people are just more drawn to older women. Business Insider points out that older women tend to be more confident and assertive than their younger counterparts. They’ve been through more, figured out what they want, and aren’t afraid to speak their minds. They also tend to know how to take care of a partner, thanks to their past relationship experiences, whereas younger women might still be figuring out who they are and what they want in a relationship.

For some younger folks, those qualities are super appealing. If someone’s into dating older women, they might find that these women can offer valuable life lessons, whether it’s about relationships, life in general, or even just being true to yourself. While it’s not really a partner’s job to teach or take care of their significant other, growing together in a relationship with an age gap can be something special.

Wrapping Up

So, there you have it! Attracting an older woman isn’t rocket science — it’s about being genuine, confident, and respectful. Remember, she’s got the experience and knows what she wants, so don’t try to play games. Just be yourself, show some maturity, and let the connection happen naturally. Whether you’re looking for something casual or serious, being honest and straightforward will always be your best bet. Now, go out there and show her what you’ve got!

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Daisy Mae

What happens when you are recently divorced and 52, and jump into online dating?