No, your defensiveness and dismissing of a very real critique on white supremacy is what is damaging White/Black relations. You are not experiencing racism, what you think you are experiencing would be racial discrimination which is not racism. But this is not even racial discrimination. It is a critique on “well intentioned” people who are white and think they are conscious but continue either knowingly or unknowingly, to support white supremacy. You posts shows that at least in your case you do not comprehend the mechanisms of racism. And yes many White people say they find racism abhorrent, but 70percent of the white vote went to a racist and he is now our President so not so as abhhorent to keep racism out of the white house, but it makes you feel like a good person to say it. I have plenty of white friends who have said “I don’t mean to be racist but,…” and then proceed to say something racist. This happens too often. In general white people do not understand racism beyond calling someone the N word. Racism is a system of oppression that is upheld and maintained to policy, economic disenfranchisement, and withholding of resources. This is not something as a whole white people in America are subjected too. For too many White people racism is just something to be debated and debunked, to black people it is literally life and death. So if your hurt feelings are making it hard for you to do the right thing, then the problem isn’t rhe message.