Bullying: The 99%

Danial Naqvi
Sep 4, 2018 · 4 min read

Kids return to school this week. They enter a world designed by Victorians for Victorians. Bullying is rife. Rife because everyone is involved — the 99%.

Filming the Stop The Bullying Documentary (release TBA) directed by Kayas (pictured right) and filmed by Saif (pictured front) in London, UK

‘You’re not alone. It’s worse. You’re one of millions. In a country of less than seventy million inhabitants, bullying remains the centre of jealous skirmishes and voiceless individuals and groups continue to be silenced. It’s past an endemic, it’s a virus and has the power to spread with no antidote on the horizon.’


I was going to stay quiet. I didn’t know how to portray my opinion on this issue where I’m too emotionally attached.

I expect the bias to be strong, but I attempt to give an account fair to both parties.

Once again, both parties are actually the same person.

Both parties are a representation of differing states of mind.

Reading the Metro and Evening Standard for the last few days, I see celebrities speaking out. Speaking out against bullying. Now, with a position of power and a voice, they speak out for those who remain voiceless and speechless.

That was me.

I had a voice, continuously suppressed by my oppressors. Constantly told I was over-reacting.

I still contend I had a voice. One heard but ignored.

There’s a difference between those who don’t speak out against their bullies and those who speak and are ignored. One passive and the other active.

It’s true that one voice won’t make a difference. You could shout and scream, you’ll be the loudest voice in the room, that’s it.

I’d love to lead the rose path to a happy solution. There isn’t one.

Bullying is a buzzword. Created by students to guilt students and teachers into proving a point and providing evidence.

I know bullying occurs outside of school. The kids are back to school and it’s the most impressionable time of your life, so let’s focus on it.

I’ve been one to say in the past that I wouldn’t be who I am today without that constant ridicule and racial slurs.

I’m comfortable in my skin, understanding of cultural difference and more aware about the dynamics of society.

I wish no-one suffered like I did, but I survived.

I survived because I went to school to learn.

I was taught to treat school like work. I didn’t go to make friends. I made friends out of necessity of the situation.

Of course, the pressure of the ridicule got to me. Most of it was self-inflicted. I had a big mouth, spoke up and paid the price.

But should it be this way?

Should the people who speak up for their freedom from bullying be the ones to suffer the consequences of retaliation?

I suppose so. That’s what it’s been like for generations.

So in fact, when you retaliate, constantly annoy and ridicule and reverse the cycle that you felt stuck in — you become the bully.

The bully who was bullied.

It’s like the superhero who became the supervillan because they were undervalued in their last position.

It’s why we take a pay cut to move jobs and feel better appreciated.

It’s why we all have this instinct to help others in their time of need, ask for a favour months later and when we don’t get a reply, resent the person and hold it against them.

Bullies don’t hold grudges, the bullied do.

But the bullied and bullies are the same people.

The reasons for the perpetuation of bullying aren’t clear, because if they were a smart person would find a reasonable solution to the issue.

It’s nuanced and complicated.

It’s not like a rise in deaths significantly correlated to a bad well like in the 1850s and the discovery of cholera thanks to John Snow.

Family issues, rising social media usage, rising wealth inequality between friends — plays a part in the reason for the constant incline of bullying.

People ask why I was bullied, I say three words:

Short, brown and fat

People don’t imagine that I have been bullied. I’m self-confident. Proud of who I am and what I want to become. I don’t resent anyone nor hold grudges.

Within each person bullied lies the ability to forgive. To forget and to move on.

Bullying and bullies won’t stop until we address the real issue here.

The real issue being that kids don’t know how to accept failure and are not happy to talk about it.

Personal or academic failure. Talk about it.

We have a rise in mental health issues amongst adolescents? Surprise surprise.

Not really actually. No-one knows how to speak about their failures.

I try to talk to people about all the times I failed as much as I succeeded. I want to know your failures, why?

I want to know you’re human.

Bullying is a real phenomena. Has been for time older than I. Cool. Now, recognise that if you ignore it, just like your mental health, it will get worse until it crashes the education system.

Because not everyone goes to school to learn. They go because they feel like they have to. They don’t want to.

School needs to teach failure.

Maybe then we can deal with bullying because before that, we’re raising an emotional unintelligent generation where one person will be Prime Minster and dealing with Kim Jong Un’s and Donald Trump’s of the future.

Think.

Bullying is in fact in the 99%.

Danial Naqvi

Written by

BA (Hons) QMUL Human Geography | MSc Science, Technology and Society Candidate

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