Fuck it all-
I’m tired of feeling afraid and unsure of everything.
I’m tired of being constantly concerned about my health.
I’m tired of always fighting with doctors.
After all, it’s my body that I live with, not theirs.
I should have a solid insight on my body and I know when things aren’t going right.
I know my body, very well.
I’m tired of crying from being scared and overwhelmed.
I’m tired of trying to always smile through the storm.
I’m so fucking tired.
Tired of trying so hard, every damn day.
This disease can destroy my quality of life with one blow.
It can strap a weight to my body and hold me down in my bed.
My bed, something once so welcoming, now like a prison.
This vicious cycle will cease to end. This is the life I lead, for the rest of my days.
A constant, overwhelming, exhausting, scary battle.
All happening inside this body of mine. Hiding from plain sight, so only I know how miserable this feels.
Nothing quite beats being trapped inside of a defective body that jumps at the chance to fall into pieces.