The Sun
Close your eyes.
Don’t force them, let them slide down, shield you from your surroundings.
Take a deep breath and let the shadows of the past, the demons of the present and grappling claws of the future drift away. What do you feel?
For a species that has always thrived under the sun, has deified and worshiped it, we seem to be built for the Darkness. The light might let us live but only on its own terms. No one has ever died of overexposure to the night, or have they? Is that calmness you feel while sealing your sight from the sunlit world yet another lie?
The sun reveals what the night has shielded. It is there to expose us, to put us in a blinding corner, accuse us of what we’ve done in its absence. Flaming fingers pointing at the weeping figures that did what they were meant for but never allowed to. From its dawn, humanity has striven to outgrow itself, to climb to the heavens, closer to the churning yellow sphere of perfection fixed in the heavenly realms.
But man is only man and has never learned to appreciate the mortal pleasures, to let them play out and purify them. We have always depended on the radiant judgement of others. Concepts, rules and boundaries that we accepted as bigger, better than what we are. You see, responsibility is a fragile yet heavy glass to hold, let alone drink from. Why take a risk and not let someone else carry it for us?
We prefer to crawl in the scorching sun, slowly dissolving while our time slips by. We drag our friends, our enemies and our loved ones into it. Suffering was never a joy to witness alone. Yet there is hope, or at least I keep telling that to myself while listening to my heart beating steadily in my self-evoked darkness.
Some of us prefer the dark, where you have to own your actions, where help only comes from yourself. Where the ones that hold unto you, do so not for what they see in you but for what they feel you doing. Where there is no one else to blame but yourself and rightfully so.
You fall, but no one knows.
You stand, yet no one applauds you.
Perhaps because we need to judge and congratulate ourselves sometimes?