How We Move
Life always goes on. When I say this, I mean, that with or with out you, or me, the very physical, concrete life of people, things, and experiences, keeps on going. Lately I’ve been thinking about many themes in my life, and I want to share them with you and how they tie in to how we move.
Recently, I’ve been thinking about how, If I post a blog post, or make a video, or even, make some sort of impact in the world, any of these actions are absorbed into the infinity of life. How many people can I listen to and support online, how many dates, and for that matter, smiles, and sharing’s between strangers can happen before I contemplate there dimming insignificance.
As I sit here on my bed writing this, people I know, are moving on. My best friends, and their life are blooming, I witness everyone on a spectrum of age, all circumventing their own experiences. Yet, here I am. What I’m trying to say is, that when we look beyond what’s going on with “us” we can see a broader horizon of what will inevitably be life that is not you or me.
In my life, I am, slowly but surely curating my future. I am for the lack of a better word, trying to harmonize myself with what I truly want, and for some reason I don’t know why my desires are so out of reach. Given, it is easier said then done to map it out, the plan, inch my inch, but doing it, and connecting yourself with what you can’t control, is tedious at best.
I’m dating, meeting people, hearing their stories, and searching for fragments of missing elements to life I haven't figured out, for fun and in hesitation. I find myself tuning into Wonfg Fu, a YouTube channel that’s renowned for their romantic and emotional shorts. I almost find myself sometimes in a fantasy, like Wong Fu’s shorts, because when I connect there themes of change, and how people are, I can connect that to what I see around me, and within myself.
Maybe I’m just getting to the point in my life where some mindsets are ending, and new ones are beginning. Mindsets that I thought we're vibrant and tangible seem to be unrealistic, and far-fetched at best. I can’t vouch for either viewpoint, because I’m still living for the one I believe in.
There seems to be this undertone to how people are, and move through space. We, live double lives, between the ones with others and people outside our selves, and the one that we live inside ourselves, navigating separate from anything external.
Maybe I’m looking into things to much, but how I move through life feels all to real. As I sit in my room, writing this, I can’t help to wonder what parallel decisions I could of made to do other things. Could I have been coming home from the night out with the “boys” that do not even exist in the life as I know it now? Or perhaps, I come home to the love of my life, waiting for me on sofa, looking outside the window from a long day, awaiting to feel my presence and warmth against hers. I wake up tomorrow, here, and maybe five decisions different, I wake up next to someone who changes my life, forever.
So we move, and we move with fluid subjectivity through our lives, unknowing what is truly there, only to want to discover, or maintain a particular order of significance within that in what we do…
I can hear the silence of this room, and the sounds floating, aloof to my presence. Again, life paying me no mind, not one sense aware of “me.”
Our moves are always, transitional. Not to long ago I wanted fluidity in my life, and now I claw at the cliff, to yearn for that special place. A quiet place, with a house so clean dust particles couldn't be found in the window reflecting light. A domain so peaceful, it might as well be inhabited. A dwelling so finite and casual, that this place moves through time unfazed.
We also move within different spaces, for instance with people. Combining this idea we decisions, had led to one of my recently revealing films, based on these themes. Who are we to have a set number of potential opportunities with the people around us, when we guide ourselves with compass called decision, That guy walking by you seems familiar, yet personally estranged. Or, reading a book in a small coffee shop parallel to a women also reading something familiar, on a corner of a busy Manhattan street.
Many people pass by, but you and her, or him, are the remaining constants of the flow, the movement. We never know who we really have exposure to unless we seize our curiosity, and explore our minds in the physical world of actions. How we move is always just, and always accurate, because the decisions we make were the ones we had made at that time. How we move is always finite, and we are fixed to move.
As I sit here, though, I do wonder how much of life is really a blank canvas, in which we can etch our decisions onto this white space, and how much these multiple canvases, come with different templates of shades. We can always choose for ourselves, but within that very decision, the effects are known, and the changes seen.
People fear creating intentions in the real physical reality, because intention is a new reality, and it was a secret now known. We move with intentions unseen, and clarity, more often grayed. Because intention leads our decisions to the lives we live, and to whom we affect in those lives, and to those thereafter. How we move is a constant in the eyes of everyone around us whether we are knowing of those observations or not.
Because of how we move, I can depend on the certainty that someone out there exists for everyone. We may or may not find someone out there that will change our world forever. By sheer “like-ness” we may stumble upon others that for one reason or another we find so important. To have these people as friends, and to have discovered them as all things are discovered. To have people walk and move with us throughout our and their lives, is really special. Because in the vastness of all the ant like people roaming about, pin-balling from decision to decision, makes my heart and mind feel safe that within probability, desired experiences can be manifested.
How you move has always been, and will always be. There is a gentleness, and particular equanimity in the process of how we move. This could be ignorance, or based by different drives and moves. There is no finite answer as to why we roam about as we do.
All you know is that you, are you, in an existence of two realities merging to create decisions to carry on your curiosities and desires. How you “move” through the world, defines you, defining how you move, is who you are, and who you will move to be.
So, how do you move, and for who, or what do you move for?