The Decline: Surviving Sundays.

A promise was made that a passing joke about my health would be used for the title of my next blog post, and as it stands, I am not one to go back on a promise. So contrary to what the sombre title may lead you to believe my current state is quite the opposite.

I usually hate Sundays, and with good reason! Unless you reside in the Upper East Side of Manhattan and spend the 7th day of the week dining on french pastry and Dom Perignon, I don’t see how any Sunday could be remotely enjoyable. Primarily, it’s the day before a Monday — which I’m sure everyone will agree brings around about as much joy as a monthly bank statement. The only people who like Mondays, are the kind of people I really don’t like, and given the conclusion that some effort ultimately has to occur on a Monday, generally, Sundays are spent:

  1. Depressed
  2. Hungover
  3. Doing some form of work
  4. All of the above

If the list above doesn’t ring bells, then maybe you and I should become friends (for the sake of my sanity) but in the meantime, I know there are many who will associate with ‘that Sunday feeling’. Recently, I’ve almost always found myself as one of these bullet points, and the result is an overwhelming sense of dread that lurks around 8/9pm. You realise your whole day was spent being excessively unproductive, you’ve probably consumed way more calories than you can justify and after 6 episodes of KUWTK, you’re reminded of the bleak state of your current account. (No, you didn’t need an extra cheeseburger with that).

Fear not…

My bittersweet situation has been enlightening, and given that I have found a new outlook on this dreadful day, I now share with you my top tips on surviving sadistic Sundays:

How to Slay Sundays: The Survival Guide to Squashing Sadness

1. Get up early. Your entire body is going to disagree with you on this one, and with good reason. You’re dehydrated, you’ve had two hours sleep and the kebab from last night has manifested as a physical burden you’re going have to carry round with you for the rest of the day. It goes against your better nature, but carpe diem did not become a popular slag tag tattoo phrase for nothing. Set your alarm for 10 and be sure to be showered and dressed by 11 — it’ll ensure you start the day feeling refreshed and puts you in a great start for stage 2.

2. Perfect your beauty regime. There is nothing that will shatter Sunday blues than feeling fresh and fabulous all at the same time. Use the tranquility of a Sunday morning to spend a little extra time on that money maker and rediscover the simpler joys of spending quality time with your cleanser. A happy face puts you in a happy place. (Must do better with rhymes).

3. Have a Blair Waldorf Brunch. Now that you are risen, refreshed and starting to overcome usual Sunday sluggishness, you are primed for the ultimate in weekend dining. Elitist sub-cultures around the world have been celebrating Sundays in this way for centuries, and there is no reason why you can’t too. It doesn’t matter if you’re not a culinary master, gather your girls and head out, letting someone else do the cooking could be a good idea given your current state, but if you are feeling up to the task, invite them over and impress with your newfound Sunday sass. Bucks fizz, croissants and bacon are really the only key ingredients, just make sure you include your favourites so the morning remains masterful, not melancholic…

4. Write the wish list. Almost every online shopping platform offers a wish-list option, and I advise you use it. At 21, you have now realised that money doesn’t actually grow on trees, and this naked truth can be very disruptive to positive shopping habits. The online wish-list allows the indulgence of selecting some new trinkets, without making any such commitment on what needs to be a stress-free day. Updating your most wanted will give you the boost of productivity every Sunday requires, without the guilt of sloppy shopping. Plus, it’s something to look forward to should you come into money on a more sensible occasion, like a Wednesday.

5. Tidy your room. De-clutter the space around you, and you’ll feel cleaner upstairs too. (Your head). Post-booze guilt is an unavoidable fate that plagues us all, and whilst putting your clothes in the wash isn’t going to remove the fact you kissed someone you shouldn’t last night, it might help in calming your fragile and fragmented memory.

6. Read. A book. A magazine. A card. I don’t really mind what it is, but just make sure you spend some time reading. Not only is it hugely relaxing, but you are working your brain and triggering the creative juices all at once, providing some blissful serenity after a motivated morning. Better still, do so in your regenerated room, and make it a space for scheduled down time.

7. Make a meal of it. Finally, cook something really great for dinner. It can be a one-woman experience, or better still, you could treat the family to your new Sunday speciality. Personally, I’d grab a cook book and try your talents in unchartered territory — a sense of accomplishment is the perfect way to end the day successfully, and nothing screams achievement like satisfied stomachs. You’ll be comfortable in the knowledge you are suitably nourished, and the flow of gratitude and empty compliments will be a great foundation for what now seems like a more manageable Monday.

I’m not sure 7 is a very round number, but I think long lists lose validity, so I’m sorry if you have an issue with odd numbers. Not really. Get over it.

Indefinitely, D.

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