No.

Can you be president of the United States without making even the most basic effort to learn anything about the job (and I mean basic, like glancing at the news once in a while or reading a book or even watching a fictional rendition of an actor playing the part of the president)?

No.

Can you be president when you habitually lie, never admit you’re wrong, and have left a trail of people almost all of whom see you as a phony and a con man?

No.

Can you be president if you say this about a guy who was held captive in the Hanoi Hilton for more than five years and then returned to serve his country in Congress: I like people who weren’t captured?

No.

Can you question the ability of a judge to rule on your case because he’s Mexican and still be president?

No.

Can you be a racist, sexist pig and still be president in 2016?

No.

Can you be the one guy in history to lose money while being the House in a casino and still pretend you know something about business and still be president?

No.

Can you threaten to build a wall, pretend Mexico will pay for it, and insinuate that those people crossing the border are criminals and rapists and still be president?

No.

Can you deeply offend your party’s leadership, and make them so sick to their stomachs that they actually endorse the other’s party’s nominee and still be president?

No.

Can you ban all Muslims from entering the US, while making supportive comments about Putin and threatening ones about NATO and still be president?

No.

Can you oppose free media and mimic a journalist with a disability (all while being orange) and still be president?

No.

Can you be president if you lie about the NFL, the Koch brothers, and a first responder from the Colorado Springs Fire Department … all in one afternoon?

No.

Can you quote yourself saying this line and still be president of the United States (or anything else for that matter): I’ve said if Ivanka weren’t my daughter, perhaps I’d be dating her?

No.

Can you take narcissism to a level never before seen by anyone, even though we’re living in the age of narcissism (when Narcissus gazed into the pond, he saw your face looking back at him) and still be president?

No.

Can you publicly criticize the parents of an American soldier who died while trying to save the lives of his fellow American soldiers; and then go so far as to compare your sacrifice to theirs when their son fought for America after 9/11 and is now dead?

No. (And this time we fucking mean it.)

Dave Pell writes NextDraft — The Day’s Most Fascinating News.
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