My Favorite Drug

Dave Ramsey
Sep 4, 2018 · 5 min read

My drug of choice can be rather pricey but people’s proclivities come in all manner of mind altering substances. The spectrum ranges from a little pep in your step in the morning to gut cleansing hallucinations in the jungle. Is caffeine addiction equatable to heroin addiction? Probably not, but each substance is still hammering away at the dopamine receptors of your brain in some capacity. I would assume so anyway, but I don’t know much about heroin except that it’s a great weight loss cure and way to find out what’s on the ‘other side’.


One side effect of the drug is fearless balance!

My favorite drug has not been clinically shown to cause death, although a small percentage may have died getting to the drug, but many pearl-clutching conservatives would tell you death is imminent when forced to take it. They live in a fear of the world and of people in general at most times, so that is an understandable response. Sadly, many people who espouse fear over love are borderline comatose from pharmaceuticals to assuage those same fears. It’s a never ending cyclical issue that pharmaceutical companies benefit from and prey on. They are akin to the Oroborus. Speaking of snakes that eat themselves, did you know that ad agencies are only permitted to run pharmaceutical ads in the United States and New Zealand? “Do you ever feel tired or have had an itch you can’t scratch? Go ask your doctor for our drug you imbecile!”

My preferred means of getting high is all-natural. God-made and man refined. Coming to is initially the worst part, but when you realize what you’ve done, then it slowly it dawns on you through a haze (and possibly drool) that you’ve been on a terrible trip, but that journey was worth it. You attempt to sit up but feel the weight of your head pull you back down. I have a cranium that no Craniologist could get his calipers around, but even you little headed people would struggle to keep it up. Once in a sitting position you will have to muster up all your energy to stand. It’s like time travel in more ways than one because now you are reliving toddler days in which you are attempting to walk for the first time and once again your parents will not have any evidence of this ever happening. One leg will be on the verge of DVT, so once standing you’ll have to drag your gimp leg while attempting to get to the window to see where you are. Navigating all manner of clothes strewn hither and yon amongst foreign looking furniture. Once your puffy face makes it to a window or balcony then you finally realize what you did and where you are.

The Hangover is Real

My first trip was outside of Toyko. We arrived to the hotel late at night and my only lasting memory was how bright it was. Not hot, but an almost unbearable brightness of blue water and blue sky on my baby blues. One of the best memories I have is walking up in a haze to look at the tranquilic and postcard quality view of Kaneohe Bay. After many years, it is still a memory that beautifully haunts me. Thanks for family friends that had a condo with a view. I woke up in the middle of the night on that trip to write rap lyrics. I’m sure they were epic. In Paris I was so worked up from going directly to the Louvre that I decided to go running at what I thought was almost dawn. The tiny hotel had a motion sensor and I was lazily harassed by a very sleepy hotel clerk who thought I was trying to leave without paying. It was not dawn, but jogging the Parisian streets when there was only a bike or drunk here and there was glorious. The river and the city were amazingly quiet. In Delhi I stood at a small kitchen window at the volunteer directors tiny flat and saw much activity in the foreground apartments and a city that stretched on and on. The most surreal experience was in Beijing at the storied Friendship Hotel where they had a boiler near our room and it was releasing steam that would fill the floor of the hallways like a reverse fire. Having jet lag and opening your door to see what you at first believe to be smoke everywhere can really disrupt your senses. To me, that is the fundamental point of travel. And the farther your travel, the worse jet lag can be, but it puts you in an open-minded place because you are so exhausted you have no other mood to be in. You have to go with the flow because you can’t control the flow. That is why anyone can become an addict on any level. We are all trying to escape, or control what we can’t. Go get jet lag. It will change your world.

When experiencing jet lag your humble author prefers to be around tan Italian men to highlight his farmers tan for comedic effect.

I realize I’ve now disappointed a lot of you recreational drug users who were looking for a fun romp of a story of some substance partaken in the jungle whereas after much visions and projectile vomiting enlightenment was achieved. I apologize. But if you teetotalers out there enjoyed it then you are welcome. If you would like to donate to my GoFundMe to support my drug habit of jet lag consumption then feel free to ask. Otherwise go chase your own lag. It’s a drug that can change the world.

If you do donate I promise to take a lot of photos and make a video with Icelandic music incorporated and I also promise not to visit Iceland. Why? Because everyone else has already gone thanks to their great marketing campaign. “Ice, the drug of your dreams, only in Iceland, and rotted whale meat, don’t forget the stinky meats, the Icelandic Meats!’

Dave Ramsey

Written by

Introspective words with humor. Travel and Race are a theme. Been published for over 20 years. Spent 10 years living back and forth from China and the U.S.

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