Fear is a mirror to your desires

=====

Since I can remember, fear is an inseparable part of me

When I’m scared, I form myself into a nightmare, into an alternative reality of crushing

What am I afraid of? What scares me? What is it that disturbs my peace?
What am I afraid of? What scares me? What reality of choice do I deprive myself of?

The light-warrior of learns from his master to embrace the fear that cracks his whole being
To surrender himself into fear, to compassion himself, to surrender himself into the first act of an unknown battle

I feel fear clutching me

From the depth of darkness I suddenly hear the voice of my Lord whispering to me, piercing my guts:
“No one will dare to take away your fear
Let him be revealed to you
Give up your desires, your dreams,
Let yourself drown in a melancholy
Stop growing,
Surrender
Do not move on
Drop yourself a victim”

Horrified, I am now wrapped in the consciousness of fear, drifting into existential anxiety

My master’s whispers become into shouts;
“Be confident, fear will take you to the right place
Freeze yourself, flee, or fight
Believe it
Let him pour a movement into you
Let him swirl your stomach
Do not let him get away
Mourn your passions that you have abandoned
Visit the cemetery
Fear is not you
And in the place you thought you were defeated, start dreaming
Start believing”

Then, out of a fraction of infinite time, the noise becomes clear to the stillness
Where fear once created, an inspiration starts growing inside of me
Where I imagined the end, I suddenly see the beginning
The pit of fall becomes a fountain
The battle scene is clear
And fear, love

=====

For I have elevated fear into my desires