I will never mimic the dyslexic in a disparaging way again!
Jay Parker (I)
1

What I find funny is my last name. If you only knew how much joking has been made directly to me and almost everyone that sees something disgusting says: Gross! Everyone, including friends and they have no idea as to how I feel about it. I do not like my last name and will be changing it. Mostly as with the Colonel Sanders type of life, my fame will not happen yet, so I can be as Gross as I want. I assure you that everyone… and there are hundreds, that have done horrible things to me over my lifetime, will never know it is me in the future. There is no benefit to my name and I will gladly trash it. On the other side, I don’t think of it until someone brings it up and like being called Dave, not: David and I do not like being called Mr. Gross and that has nothing to do with the word and what it has come to mean. I am the perpetual child. Even though I have the ability to do many things including knowing what people mean from the words they say. I only need to be told things 1 time. I make the mistake 1 time and then… next time it is a new one.. unless my dyslexia gets hit. I used to do negative self talk, but thanks to the Higher Power, I accept that I have it and am kind to myself and will tell someone who sets me off to go… without caring how they take it. I know from my Mom, how to get into people’s personal space and am fine with that. Lastly, I have the ability to yell and be mean without having my blood pressure rise. Much better to get things off your chest than to hold bad feelings in. I know I will die and as much as possible, I not only accept it, but am OK not knowing what will happen when I do. I only know that when anyone dies, they are no longer a part of Earth. As far as it goes, my only advice to you Jay: do not live your life with even 1 regret. If you have any, do the things you need to and rid them from you. No time like the present and you never have to confront anyone directly. So, if you are holding bad feelings against a dead person, you don’t need them to forgive yourself. In my not so humble opinion, being virtuous whenever it is possible gives me the greatest feeling… next to the TM session where I had no thoughts and my body pain all vanished… seemed like a long time until I looked at the clock when a thought came in and they will while you are alive. So, that is my advise: never have regret. dave.

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