Letter to my Love….

Dearest Sweetheart:

Well today….Friday, May 6, 2016, marks one week since I made the big move back to Texas that you and I talked about almost a year ago. I remember our conversation as if it happened yesterday and in fact, I will probably always carry that memory with me.

I remember how you took my hand in both of yours and you fixed me with an intent stare with those beautiful, blue eyes and said: “Darling, we need to talk about the future.”

I remember how I tried to deflect the words I knew was coming. I did not want to consider the future, I only wanted to live in that moment alone, with you next to me. But, as always in our relationship, you had your way and we talked about all the things we feared the most.

It was the most honest and the most intense conversation I have ever had or will ever have again and when it was over, we held each other close, as if we could, with our love, fend off the wolf at our door. Little did we know in that moment, that a massive heart attack would ambush you just a month or so later, rendering your battle with Cancer a moot point.

So here I am darling, six hundred miles from our farm and staying with my daughter. I have managed to fulfill each of the promises you wrung from me on that day. I have found loving homes for all our animals with the exception of the Fab Five pups who remain at my side, as I also promised and, of course, the biggest promise you wrung from me that day….I am still here. Of all the promises I made you that day, staying behind on this earth without you has been the hardest for me to keep. I kept that promise though and you knew I would, that’s why you insisted I make it. You knew that I have never, ever, broken a promise I made to you. Yes, you are indeed a sly one, my love.

Yup, you planned it well my love. You said that in the event that you lost your fight, you wanted me and the pups to go home to Texas and a large part of my family and here I am. I am here just like you wanted but please, don’t expect me to be all happiness, rainbows, and unicorns about the situation. The truth is, I’m an old man who has, because of circumstance, been forced to intrude on the lives of our younger generation. I have tried to stay out from underfoot as much as I can, but they have their own lives to lead and I have become what all older people fear….irrelevant.

I got to tell you, sweetheart, this whole “living” thing is damn hard without you but then I’m not done yet. I still have one more promise to keep before I’m done. I still have to make the trip North to take you home to Michigan. I saved the hardest chore for last it would seem because once I return you to where I first found you, we will be truly separated for good and that is going to be a river too wide to cross, I fear.

Okay….enough of all the gloom and doom crap. Let me just close this letter by telling you a bit of good news. I am FINALLY going to get my hair cut, hopefully today. I can almost hear you saying: “Well it’s about time.”

It is just going to be strange having someone else do that chore besides you. You remember, we use to have some of our best talks while you clipped this wild bush on my head and I use to so love the feel of your fingers running through my hair…..ah, those memories.

Anyway, the deed shall be done and I will once again have that short wool you use to love.

I guess that is all I have for today, my love. I will write to you again soon, I promise and you know….I always keep my promises to you.

All my Love,

David