DAYS I HAVEN’T MET CHARLIE BROOKER

It’s a Designers’ World Out There

Inner Dialogues

- The Right Side of My Brain -

Day 53

8. INT. DAY. MY HEAD

ME 2

You know putting words inside an image on Instagram doesn’t count, don’t you?

ME 1

And why is that?

ME 2

It’s cheating! Dude, you’re like that mom feeding kids fried healthy food. You’re social media’s Milli Vanilli

ME 1

I’m not fooling no one. It’s the only way I found to expose myself lightly and not so lightly, without limiting my thoughts to 140 key punches. It’s my Coke Zero.

ME 2

Which is another hidden lie! Anyway, they ignore it… and they’re your friends! That’s what kills me the most.

ME 1

I’m competing with food that looks like it’s dressed up to go out Friday night on a date and have sex afterwords, with tropical hidden paradises that are apparently known by everyone on my fucking timeline but me and perhaps 3 to 5 new-born Cartier-Bressons. And that’s not exclusively on Instagram!

ME 2

Maybe use fire, man! Like, fire against fire, you know?

ME 1

What are you talking about?

ME 2

I don’t know. Sell yourself through some images. Make some drawings, some cartoons, some comics. Use some photos…

ME 1

Were you away as I was growing up? I can’t do any of those!

ME 2

People still buy books…

ME 1

What do you mean?

ME 2

There’s still people reading out there. Maybe you’re not selling yourself to the right crowd…

ME 1

You mean Internet users?

ME 2

Dude, you’re so defensive. People like short stuff. Maybe…I don’t know, just write some catchphrases and stuff…

ME 1

I’m not an 80’s cartoon. You must live on the right side of my brain.

ME 2

Alright, Mr. Artist who can’t perform, what the shit can you do then?

ME 1

Maybe I only have the one side…

…Day 53, Charlie, I can draw some Gokus, you know?

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