I ramble about politics at 3 AM, how about you?

As any other person that frequents the internet, I log onto facebook daily to view my friends’ shared articles and pictures, I’ve noticed the unavoidable — my millenial peers’ support for Democratic Presidential candidate, Senator Bernie Sanders (Vt).

As I naviagate through this primary Presidential election cycle of 2016, I am conflicted, not undecided, but conflicted. I was raised to be an intersectional feminist, not directly by my family — but by the circumstances facing many minority women even in Miami, a famously hispanic majority city within Southern Florida. Social issues regarding race and gender inequality have very much influenced my decision to join the Democratic party, they being the championing reason why I, on my 17th birthday, registered to vote a year early.

I grew up knowing what a hanging chad was (no, it didn’t take the sitcom “How I Met Your Mother” to teach me that) and I asked questions about global warming when I first heard Al Gore mention it. I know Nixon’s only great contribution was the Environmental Protection Agency, and that was the only reason I haven’t politically damned him to hell with other conservative faux pas presidents.

What I’m trying to say is, I’m not a snot-nosed kid nor at all ignorant, I’m quite educated and I know I cannot be alone in my confliction this primary cycle.

After reading Daniel Kushner’s article last night on why he can’t #FeeltheBern and truly resonating on his reasoning, decided to express my own thoughts to my community — my facebook friends and my parents (hola, mami y papi).

To be completely transparent, I had never heard of Senator Bernie Sanders prior to his announcement of joining the Democratic presidential race. I have been idly surprised by the man’s vibrant stage presence and left-wing politics. Sanders is brilliantly and literally yelling at millennials what they want to hear after years of a stubborn congress and broken political process. And its working for the most part, except along with the aforementioned PHd candidate Daniel Kusher, I too am not feeling the bern, and for a string of reasons.

For starters, I have a sincere issue with the pace and exaggerant enthusiasm of most Bernie supporters (please remember, I am not bashing anyone in particular). Social media/the Internet is not a safe place for non-Bernie supporters especially those who suffer from political claustophobia as I do. As the academic that I am and strive to continue to be, I haven’t made a legitimate endorsement for either democratic candidate, well until this very post. *Albeit, when no one was actually running against Hillary I was very much YAS HILLARY* I have very strong feelings about BOTH these candidates, both good and bad. I do not believe in a perfect candidate and it’s shocking just how much that word is tossed around these days and therefore, truly respecting any individual’s decision to vote for whomever they’d like — yes even the likes of Trump (let’s not get started on that one, not tonight).

I have seen countless of memes (the internet’s way of memorializing a social phenomenona in a combination of witty repetitve images and occasional word play) smearing Hillary and her undeniable significance to this election season and well, history. People are also effortlessly hitting the share button on post after post on any comparative, almost ill-spirited “How can we further exploit this candidate’s PERSONAL weaknesses rather than their potential/actual political contribution?”. I say to these posts and memes, let the candidates have it out for each other, that’s sort of why these debates exist, primarily to educate us the public on where they stand but also a very public forum for them to poke fun at one another and then shake hands at the end of the night. Both sides have begun negative campaigning of some sort (whether low-key or high-key*) whether you like to admit or not, and its feeling a little mean-girly except in the latter half of the millennium where subtweeting became the go-to form of passive-aggression.

It’s sort of sexist.

Bernie is the man, in the cool way of speaking, not in terms of establishment ‘the man’. He’s very cool, he’s that cool grandpa some of us have and those who don’t, wish that we did. Bernie has a wonderful marriage and hasn’t had much political trials or tribulations besides his longevity in Congress, none of which have to do with his direct personal life. It is the opposite on the Hillary camp. It seems as though, everything that people criticize about the woman has to do with her personality and her tendancy to be seen as a “wet blanket”, “shrewd” on top of her husband’s infidelity scandal, that to this day still causes a minute group of voters to refuse to even listen to her on this alone. It’s easier to be the man who has it all together, it’s not as easy to be a public female figure — especially one for the past 20 years, in a time where there haven’t been many to give us women hope. I wrote about Hillary Rodham Clinton in the 3rd grade, because she had been elected Senator of the state of New York a few years back and I was fascinated that a first lady didn’t just choose fine china or pondered thread counts and actually pursued her own path aside from her husband’s.

Both candidates actually agree on a lot, and that’s what a lot of millenial voters are missing over the screaming and hand waving of Sander’s campaign. This is where I start to doubt the Bern, I absolutely respect and admire Sanders commitment to fighting all sorts of inequality as well as crumbling race relations and other inefficiences that our country faces (i.e healthcare, social security, what to do with Wall Street). Whereas Bernie appears to be a look at the glass half-full kind of individual, Hillary is made out to be his complete opposite, look at the glass half-empty individual. This is not a matter of creating complete opposites. Sanders has made his agenda clear, and although a noble one, the numbers are not there. As an economics minor, I’m aware of how the Congress budgets expenditures and quite frankly, these numbers are significant and will determine whether or not these plans even occur. I have no assurance as to how these big liberal-minded ideas will pan out or if they even will. He’s given a slight insight into what his healthcare plan would do for the wallet’s of middle-America families (would save them about $5000 in healthcare cost) but no statistics on how any of this can even be achieved.

In terms of foreign policy, there is no denying Hillary’s expertise as well as her failings. No one is celebrating her as #GOAT in terms of Secretaries of States go, but she did a good job considering the circumstances and has been taking hits for her shortcomings ever since (predominantly on the Republican side, but that’s not what we’re talking about here). Bernie lacks a foriegn policy foundation despite his 25 years in congress and always appears dodgy on the subject. Although, he did appear to get his feet a little wet in tonight’s debate in Milwaukee.

Do I know who’s going to win the democratic nomination? No, not yet. It’s too early to tell as both candidates have one primary each under their belt.

Will I vote a democratic ticket come general election season? Of course. I will support the Democratic presidential nominee, whoever that is.

Do I have a preference? yes, a slight lean towards HRC.

I understand the #Bern, but I just frankly do not feel it. I’ve got oven mitts on.