This Will Be My Last SXSW

This will be my last South by Southwest
I’m so tired of waiting in lines
For each session and show
And wherever I go
This is not what I call a good time

This will be my last South by Southwest
How I’m done with the spring break for nerds
I would party till 4
Now each one is a chore
As I dodge all the Bock-drunken herds

This will be my last South by Southwest
Now there’s never new tech anymore
Once came Foursquare and Twitter
But most hit the shitter
VCs can’t find much to adore

This will be my last South by Southwest
Once I longed for the brisket and pork
Meat salted and fried
Does a number inside
So next year I will hang up my fork

This will be my last South by Southwest
I can catch the best keynotes online
Hmm, go catch the Obamas
Or stay home in pajamas?
A weekend to myself seems fine

This will be my last South by Southwest
I don’t need to run into celebs
Hooray, they’re so wealthy
Come on, take a selfie
Not I; I’ll go hang with the plebs

This will be my last South by Southwest
Sure, I’ve said this before — I’ve confessed
Despite how I protest
I’ll be back for the next
When I’ll swear I’m done, South by Southwest