The Reckoning

Debbi R. Saragih
Jul 24, 2017 · 2 min read

Is there anything that we could do? Bombarded with complex issues daily, how not we wonder, are we really able to solve them? “We’ll die anyway” resounds wherever we go. It’s only a matter of when and how.

I might not have clear understanding about the world. Nor I believe there’s someone who knows it fully. It ain’t fun, I guess, when human knows what to do. There’ll be no place for fear- overcoming it won’t be glorious.

If what happened, happened, it’ll be so easy to forgive. Easier to let go all the grudge we haven’t fully accept. Acceptance, like forgiveness, demands the whole of ourselves. How could we let go part of ours to someone we can’t forgive? Something we can’t accept? Without adequate understanding in the chaotic nature of the world itself, letting go is devastating.

Even when one understands, knows how to, she/he could choose not to forgive or accept things that happened. After all, knowledge only serves options, it is us, who choose. Leaves the right or wrong debate elsewhere. Morality isn’t truth and truth is not the sole aspect to consider. The most important part about decision is: it precedes consequences. “Are we ready for whatever will come?” That’s better than asking “What will come?”

Life is great. It gives us with many possible options. Alas, it doesn’t teach us how to choose what’s best for us. Maybe, there’s no such a thing called ‘best decision’? Maybe what’s best is an illusion we make to soothe ourselves. We’re so afraid to know that what we didn’t choose might serve our best intention. Good thing is, we don’t ask ourselves too much. It’d be torturing, wouldn’t it?


Today is a part of long road we pass. It might be bumpy now and smooth in another. No one really knows what he/she’s doing in this world. We came here signing a contract without reading terms and agreements. As usual, we try to fit it with the best deal we could get. I made a concept in my mind, “If I signed the contract, it means I am able to fill it.” Even though I might be wrong, I’ve tried, and that legally binding agreements should end. There’s no court-posthumously.

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