Life is being. Life is BEING! (Ryan McGuire |

The 7 Worst Things about Bombing

Other than the act of bombing a performance itself, here are the seven worst things about bombing on stage:

  1. Hearing how your performance/speech was “interesting.” Code for “It’s all I can do to keep from laughing in your face.”
  2. Having someone say, “It’s great to see people try something new.” (Does the 100th time count as something new?)
  3. Receiving pity hugs and pats on the back. Code for “My condolences on the loss of your dignity.”
  4. Noticing people avoid eye contact, or seeing the fear in someone’s eye as you approach them. (Be scared. Be very scared! I have to rub this bad juju off on someone!)
  5. Forgetting to smile and laugh like everything is OK. (My mouth is busy licking my wounds, THANK YOU VERY MUCH.)
  6. Not noting all the exits in the building before taking the stage. A quick escape trumps all the above-mentioned humiliation.
  7. Deciding this one bad performance defines not only who you are as a performer, but also who you are as a person. (I shall stay in bed pondering every decision I have ever made, my existence and the perseverance of the universe despite my best and worst efforts. Life is being. Life is BEING!)

On the plus side: self-awareness means you have the ability learn and grow. So there’s that.

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