39 Ways To Be The Highest Status Person In The Room
Greetings.
Allow me to preface this article by articulating my thoughts on ‘social status.’
I don’t think nor care about social hierarchies. I believe that social status is not good or bad, it’s just a tool you can use to help achieve your goals. Just like any other tool, you maximize the benefits and minimize the negatives.
In regards to social status, the battle to be the “#1 alpha male” in a group does not concern me.
This post is about the vast inner world of being high status and some outward expressions that come with it.
The inner world of high status = who you are not what you do.
A high status man is known for the following among other factors:
- You are a great man
- You are known for being genuine
- You are a cool likeable guy
- People love to have you around
Some of the following 41 way’s boost your status immediately. Others are developed over a life-long conscious growth process. I wrote this for men originally but the majority (besides testosterone) could be used for women.
1. Workout, sculpt your body to perfection.
This is more than looks. The type of person that spends hours at a discipline. The type of person that doesn’t give into impulses. The type of person that can make a commitment AND keep it.
These are traits of the high status man.This type of person LOVES going to the gym. He is determined and willing to put in the work.
The added benefit of going to the gym is raising your testosterone, becoming happier, sleeping better and increased creativity.
2. Love Yourself
The high status person has an aura of self love that permeates through every single movement. Every spoken word or idea.
It’s a choice to love all of you (including that part you hate). No child has ever looked in the mirror and said “I wish I didn’t have freckles!”.
Love yourself. Love your accent. Love your freckles. Love every part about you, because it’s more useful than hating yourself.
Read “Love Yourself Like Your Life Depends On It” by Kamal Ravikant for more.
3. Raise testosterone and lower cortisol
This is an absolute necessity for men.It’s also an extremely easy fix.
Increased testosterone will have immediate effects on your thoughts.
Better thoughts = better feelings = better actions = better character = better destiny. Raising testosterone literally changes your life.
You lower cortisol because it is the stress hormone. Thus making you more calm, more at ease and increase happiness.
4. Have incredible self-talk
Our mind is simple. It attempts to bring us closer to pleasure and avoid pain.
If your mind thinks about walking into a meeting and the mental pictures you are experiencing are telling you that people are judging you and hating you…rest assured you will be in for a tough time.
High status people have incredible talk in between their ears that allows them to find pleasure in what low status people find painful.
5. Body language
There are experts out there that are much better at talking about this then me. But in terms of principles there are two you must follow:
- Be open. It’s extremely simple. Just don’t be closed (arms, legs etc).
- Take up space. High status people are not afraid to take up space and don’t try to act invisible.
6. Be around high status people
If you are around a bunch of low-status people it’s easier to fall into their reality if you aren’t mindful.
If you are stuck with a certain group, then make sure to watch or talk to a friend that's high status or a video of someone you admire.
7. Posture
Chest forward, shoulders back, chin up. Posture changes your thoughts which affect your feelings. It makes you feel immensely more confident.
Posture is not something you turn on and off. If you are reading this right now sitting down….How is your posture?
If it’s absolutely terrible. I recommend you go to the Egoscue clinic. If it’s mediocre read an article about it here.
8. Be actually happy
A great friend of mine said that happiness is smiling to yourself when you are alone in the elevator.
It’s a strong feeling of content. It’s not high energy.
There is a distinction between being happy and joyful.
Joy = happy + excitement.
Happiness is just a deep contentment. You are happy with life and you take conscious steps every day to keep you in this state.
(Gratitude, working out, self-talk, environment).
9. Walk slowly
What's the rush? Slow the fuck down. When you walk slowly you start noticing your surroundings.
You become more mindful.
The high status person is not in a rush to do anything.
If you must walk faster be quick but don’t hurry. Each step is mindful as you kiss your feet against the floor.
10. Don’t be easily impressed
Are you looking at the Mona Lisa? No? Okay, then.
Stop responding to the mundane as if you just heard the news that Pluto became a planet again.
11. Demand attention when you talk
When conversing with another human, make sure your words are landing on engaged ears.
In Russian there is a saying that translated means “do you hear me or are you just listening to me?”.
Pause until you have their full attention. If they are distracted don’t continue the conversation.
12. Think big thoughts
Next time you are waiting, take this opportunity to think BIG THOUGHTS. The high status person is bigger than their problems.
Think about billion dollar problems. Think about your mission in life. Big thoughts fill your head. Contemplate BIG ideas. There is no time to be grounded in reality.
13. Touch people
Touch a shoulder, an elbow, give a hug, shake a hand.
There are no barriers to touching people. Make sure to use social awareness and absolutely no groping. It’s all in the flow of the conversation.
14. High status eye contact
Eyes are filled with warmth and tinged with a sense of aliveness.
When you break eye contact never look down.
The key to high status eye contact is in the transition. Once you lock eyes with someone never dart to the next target. Hold for three, two, one and very slowly look left or right.
15. Do less , be more.
Say a sentence without speaking. Move without moving. Ask without asking.
Follow the law of least effort. What can you communicate in a sentence that used to take a paragraph?
Do less, be more.
16. Have a generous spirit, everyone gets love
Pick up the bill. Pour the drinks. Invite people into conversations.
It’s a generous spirit that surrounds everything you do. Living like this is an expression of having abundance in your life.
17. Boundaries
While having this generous spirit and attitude you have clear boundaries.
You say things like “don’t do that” or “don’t behave like that.”
You have a generous spirit but do not allow people going over your boundaries.
The high status man is not afraid to assert himself against challengers to the throne.
18. Laugh loudly
The high status man doesn’t hold back at all.
Never again hold back your laugh, your smile. Show up fully (that means all of you). If he feels sad, he says it. If he’s happy he says. The high status man is genuine.
19. Shake hands correctly
Read this: A Manly Handshake: An Illustrated Guide
This is part of making a great first impression. Don’t mess this up. It’s simple but not always easy.
20. Don’t go out of your way to befriend high status people
The high status person doesn’t randomly befriend other high status people. If he must, he will.
Ask for introductions. Let it happen naturally and organically. You can have a target but you don’t go out of your way to make a connection. Ask for an introduction. Find commonalities and understand that it won’t happen overnight.
21. Entitled Attitude
The high status person is entitled. There of course is healthy and not healthy levels to this.
Healthy entitlement is the sense that you have the right to want things, even if you might not get them. Or you can be like Conor McGregor’s level of entitlement: Watch this from 3:12 onward.
22. Master how to have great first impressions
Master the craft of having great first impressions. The intention would be that within seconds of meeting you this person is in awe.
Learning to shake someone's hand, warm eye contact, remembering their name and the energetic connection behind it are all crucial to master this.
23. Dress well, utilize the halo effect
Look good you feel good. Get out of your comfort zone. Never wear cargo shorts again. Wear a dress shirt, a tie, nice pants and ABSOLUTELY wear great shoes.
24. Placement
Where are you standing? If the opportunity presents itself the high status man always chooses the most comfortable seat. Choose to have your back against a wall so no-one could be behind you.
25. Walk in and stop.
Walk into the nightclub, the meeting room, the coffee shop and stop for three seconds. Look around, smell the air and then continue on your path. SHOCKING how doing this makes you 668% more charismatic and magnetic.
26. It’s all good
Your mindset is completely content. It’s all good. That’s good. That’s good. Oh, that? that’s also good. Unfailing coolness, it’s all good even if it's bad it’s good. “It’ll be alright” type of attitude. A high status person is bigger than their problems.
27. Have an impossible mission
Have an impossible mission for yourself that you are creating. It takes a great man to decide to occupy Mars. Choosing an impossible goal like stopping world hunger. This elevates your inner world of status to the infinite degree.
28. Speak for the group and to the group
High status people are leaders. Not followers. As a leader you take charge of the group, you speak to the group lead in the direction that’s best for everyone.
29. Have impeccable social skills
You have an incredible external awareness. You understand what’s happening underneath the surface. You understand group dynamics. You feel into the mood of the group as a leader. You know when to be silent. You know when and how to connect deeply.
Communication is your most valuable skill that CAN and MUST be developed.
30. Don’t talk with an upward pitch
You don’t finish your sentences with an upward intonation. This is an expression of people pleasing behavior. You end your statements and questions the same way they were started.
There is not an ounce of people pleasing or seeking for agreement when you communicate as a high status man.
31. Make statements rather than questions.
How are you? vs. Tell me about your day.
What made you do that? vs. Im curious what drove you to do that.
Simple switch that changes the whole dynamics of a conversation.
32. Don’t gossip
Ray Dalio banned gossip in his offices. High status people ban it from their entire life. It makes you look terrible. The high status person is gossiped about, not the gossiper. Plus, remember that you have more important things to talk about like that mission from #27.
33. Don’t complain
The high status man is a creator. He isn’t complaining about how the world is. There is absolutely no reason to complain. The high status man either accepts reality or works to change it.
Stop talking about your emotional injuries “you won’t believe what happen to me today” yes I will, stop your victim shit immediately.
34. Warmth
Warmth in your eye contact. Your voice. Your body language.
It disarms people immediately. Warmth creates connection and lowers the wall that are around people's ability to connect.
35. Have an air of effortlessness
This can only TRULY be achieved if you have suffered, you have put in the fucking work in private to shine in public. You have spent hours perfecting your skills in life and the social world. Then you can truly be effortless and natural and spontaneous.
36. Directness
Yes.
No.
If it’s not a hell yes, it’s a no for now. The high status isn’t ‘floaty’ he is direct and decisive. This is reflected in conversation, movement and presence.
37. Be a master seducer
The world is your playground. You walk into a room and understand that it’s all a game. This is your playful philosophy on life.
You understand the fundamental aspect of humans. They are bored. People are bored. People are begging to be seduced, to be led astray and come alive. The high status person gives them this gift.
PS. The power from a master seducer comes from his ability to BE seduced. Seduced by great food, art, beauty and romance. Be sensitive to pleasure (this puts you in a positive mood no matter what is happening).
38. You don’t need anyones approval.
The high status doesn't do anything for approval. He realizes it’s not his responsibility that people are comfortable in his presence. He doesn’t suppress his energy or spirit for anyone.
The paradox of this, is that people actually like him because he is NOT a people pleaser.
39. Every day raise your status
You work on yourself every single day. Health, wealth, relationships, spirit and all the buckets that matter to you.
Every day you work on your inner prestige so you truly are the highest status person in the universe for YOURSELF.
Use any one of these as reminders or challenges to use this week.
Be surprised and curious in the approach and you will be astounded.
Write in the comments any insights you had while reading this.
