My Life Has Improved So Much Since I Got Rid Of My Cellphone And Escaped The Labyrinth

Modern life has given us so many amazing things, but I hate to say it: sometimes technology has it’s downsides. I know what you’re thinking: toasters have no faults. True. But look at other technologies, like cellphones. Everyone tapping away, staring at their little screens, forgetting the world around them. Last week, I made a big change in my life: I got rid of my cellphone. And I also escaped the Labyrinth I’ve been in for seven years.

It’s been crazy. I feel more alive, more attune to the world around me, especially now that I’m not enclosed in an ever-shifting stone prison. I’m reading novels, writing in a journal, and not once have I sharpened a stick into a spear to prepare for my inevitable conflict with The Minotaur, guardian of the lair. I bet most of you can’t imagine what that’s like.

How do I keep in touch with my friends? I knock on their doors, of course. How do I keep up with the news of the day? Ever heard of a newspaper? How do I navigate the shadowy passages shepherding me closer to the center of my monstrous keep? Turns out it’s pretty cool not to have to do that. Who knew?

I promise I’m not doing this to be “better than you.” I got rid of my cellphone to live my life in the moment, and I escaped the Labyrinth to see my family again. Charlotte is twelve years old now. She doesn’t remember my name. My husband introduced me as “an old friend.” He remarried. Her name is Karen. She’s a schoolteacher and on Saturdays she takes Charlotte apple picking, you know, up at McKluskey’s Orchard? For seven years I ate nothing but withered foliage and the occasional critter. Karen is a pescatarian.

I’m happy I made the change. Life is simpler. No more late-night texts, especially not from Greg. He thinks it’s best if I only my daughter once a week. We don’t know how to break it to her. We may never tell her the truth. But I’ll entirely present in every single moment until that happens!