Pets, Expectations, and Saying Goodbye

My dog passed away yesterday. She lived at home with my parents and little sister. Last year I moved from Los Angeles to the Bay to start a new job. The last time I saw her was a few months ago when I came home to visit.

The one thing I’ve come to learn (especially the older I got) is that things hardly ever go the way you want them to. So you gotta make due with whatever you can. I’m sad I didn’t get say goodbye to her, Lala meant a lot to me. What makes this even shittier is that I’m driving back home tomorrow for a festival. I wish she could have held on a little longer.

In general endings are never easy, they are either unexpected or we build them up so much in our heads they can’t possibly meet our expectations (looking at you Lost and Dexter). So I’m writing this. This is my goodbye to my dog, who I loved, and who’s memory I’ll continue to love.

We got you after our first dog ran away. You were a present from my sister’s Godmother. You already had the name Lala, we decided to keep the name since you already responded to it. When we first got you, you fit in the palm of my hand, man were you incredibly tiny. I was in middle school when we first met, I am 24 now. You’ve been there throughout my entire adult life: high school, college, break-ups and so on.

The thing I will miss the most about you is this. We lived in tiny two bedroom apartment. I didn’t have a bedroom so I slept in the living room. I would bring you up the couch to sleep next to me. You would wait for me to adjust myself so you could do the same without bothering me.

I just want to say sorry I couldn’t be there to say farewell. I’ll miss you, thank you for everything.

I realize how important goodbyes tend to be the older you get. To those reading this, do me a favor and pet your dog or cat for me. It will mean a lot to me.