You came out of the womb, with a cry and a scream,
fleshly red skin touching the air flowing in hospital hallways
you came out of your baby bed
you crawled on your knees to stand up and go outside
in front of your house, your mom screaming from the 3rd floor for you to come home
it’s past 9, getting dark, go to bed and say good morning wait your breakfast
at the big table at your kindergarten
you hate the butter and the jam, it tastes so poorly, but u never refuse the tea,
you grew up only skin and bones
the smallest ball could make your knees bent and your head spinning
you move to a new house and you feel like you lost all your neighborhood friends
but maybe you’ll see them again, in a shop, in a cornerstone bar but you wonder silently
Is that you, Anna, remember when we played dolls and hide-and-seek in the rotten building 2 blocks away from our home but you barely remember it yourself,
when you lay in your college dorm bed, after a few fags and 3 beers, the cheapest beer at the club downtown that you can barely afford eventually giving you a dreary headache that will remind you, you’re still alive
and you listen to the world how it sings and its words crumble and lighten up when the music is being played at the radio in the car,
you have to move again, 3 trolleys and a suitcase, back in your hometown for the summer, it’s been a lot to digest, you need to start all over, you’re at the border between end and beginning
but your time seems dreary and unfaithful when you keep failing because here you are in a car on a 6 hours drive on the same road you took in the beginning when your dreams were heavier than 22 years of life contained in boxes and bags.
but it’s been 3 years apart, standing on the same place, with the opposite direction to follow, a mind so hollow, and a heart so crushed and beaten, it’s like someone sucked all its blood and returned it shallow and dried
and the only words that come out of your mouth represent the fainted echo of something that was there, so many dreams and paths, a love for those who run away, a title, a poem, a self confession, stars enclosing wishes, living them for a few moments, a blink of an eye doesn’t seem so scary, taking the high road but where, cause you seem lost,
all the magic stardust scattered in the wind just like your desire to be an artist,
but you realize life come fast kid, you know, time is cruel and it won’t stop to look at you day dreaming amid the flowers, cause you gotta survive,
dreams won’t make you fill the table, keep you warm on a stormy night,
life comes fast in a blink of an eye, it hits you on a Sunday night, when everyone is in motion, and you choose to stay in the mud, and you crawl and you know you gotta survive, you didn’t anticipate this moment, you used to run away thinking you have plenty of time, but here you are, in a car with all your life in the trunk mixed in bags and you’re heading to your new place that you can only fool yourself in calling that a home, fuck it’s already 9, you’re tired, you smoke and you drink a nice red glass of cheap wine in your bed and you close your eyes and time flies and your alarm rings off, shit you’re late again but that’s alright, because it’s not your fault, you had to wait forever for the train to come.
