photo via Alexas_Fotos / pixabay.com

19 More Pre-Existing Conditions Not Covered by the AHCA

One labia bigger than the other

Belly button lint

Not pregnant, just had a Chipotle Burrito Bowl for lunch

Underboob sweat

Once smelled the top of a baby’s head and liked it

Turned knob left when spin instructor told you to turn it right

Have Googled “signs a headache is brain cancer”

Lied about your marathon time

Never ran a marathon at all

Don’t own a juicer

Still not sure how to pronounce “açaí”

Once farted during yoga

Knew the fish taco you were eating was about to give you food poisoning but kept eating it anyway

Bought a family-sized bag of chips just for yourself more than once

Felt like you were about to get a cold but it was just allergies

Menstrual blood isn’t blue like in the pad commercials

Sometimes pee a little when you laugh

Not really into probiotic yogurt

Thought you had a weird mole but it was just chocolate