Honestly speaking, parenting can be hard, at times. Parents find them in situations where arguments or difference with children over little things may turn into fights. However, it does not mean that these differences or friction between you and your children cannot be overcome. So, the following article will help you take easy steps to sort the issues or ease the tension between you and your loved ones.
Anger can make people lose their sense and it can make you do things you wouldn’t do otherwise. For instance, you may say hurtful things to your children you don’t mean. This means that staying calm can help to save you from regret and bad feeling for your children. So, the first step is to take charge of the sentiments by taking a deep breath or having a glass of water to divert your mind from losing temperament. Moreover, rather than focusing on the mistakes of your children, it is good to focus on the good times you have spent with your children. Although it may sound hard to do, however, if you deliberately try to practice it or show patience, you may feel glad and get better at it.
It has been noticed that parents often get mad at the children due to the fear of some mistake or worrying about them more than needed. For instance, if you wish your children to go into the traditional careers or field of study and if it is not what the kids like, you may feel frustrated or at odds with them. Therefore, it is important to remember that children go through various phases and they eventually do come around or they will change your mind in the long run. So, the best approach is to give them space to be themselves and attempt to understand in form of building bridges rather than fearing the unknown or their future prospects.
See From the Perspective of Children
It is important to understand that children are not necessarily against you, they are looking to get what they like in addition to being your child. Therefore, if you learn to acknowledge that the children, especially the ones who are growing up may be in a tougher position than you are. For example, if your child is fighting with another child or his/her sibling over the kids car, that person may not be necessarily bad or ill-mannered, rather kids are mostly afraid or defensive when they are little. Aggression in children is usually a reaction or defensive mechanism against the fear or insecurity among children.
Make a List of Good Points about Your Children
If you have a habit of losing temperament or if you see more demerits in your children, you can make a list of all the merits in your children so that it would help you get a perspective and control your negative thoughts in a better way. The main purpose is to balance your world view about children. Of course, overlooking the mistakes or negative points of your children is also not suggested; however, if you become completely critical, it may create more problems or make your relationship difficult.
Even though most of the parents know the significance of forming bonds with children, however, the busy routine or temporary misunderstanding may create the sense of distant among them. For instance, if you play games or spend time getting to know them or make an effort to be a part of their lives, you can become a good friend to them as well. It is all about showing your love and support in addition to making sure that they are being responsible. Similarly, some of the parents like to talk about how their day went so that children also become a part of their lives. The main point is to make your child feel secured or loved in terms of making your relationship with the child stronger and reliable. Additionally, if you expect good results overnight, you may be disappointed because making your bond deeper with your children may take a lot of energy and patience. However, if you remain persistent and support your children, it will show unexpected results that you can cherish in the long term.
It is okay to have the differences, but it is not okay if you don’t know how to resolve them or how to make them less contentious. For example, if you don’t give the due attention to your children, they may drift apart from you. However, if you make an effort to become a part of the lives in form of indulging them in discussion particularly over the significant issues or problems while growing up, chances are your children will appreciate the effort and open up to you rather than outsiders. Another benefit of discussing is that you get a glimpse into the thought process of your children. This means that if you can’t convince your children to do something or over a certain subject, they may persuade you to relieve the tension, especially if you keep your mind open to every possibility. In addition, children get to learn from your experience if you actively talk to them about your routine and views in addition to sharing your life lessons with them.
Of course, parenting is a hard job that involves patience, understanding and working on the relationship, however, like other relationship, if you actively take steps to show your concern for the bond with your children, they will also replicate the efforts or show signs to you, which may make the tasks of parenting manageable if not completely easy for you. Furthermore, the more you learn to empathize with your children, the level of understanding ad trust will increase, which are two essential ingredients that make the relationships in general stronger and compatible. Lastly, giving importance to your children over your other responsibilities also reflects how important your children are for you and the level of reliance with your children is likely to improve.