So I used to sell old doughnuts on the playground..

True story.

When I was growing up we would walk ourselves to school and along the way I (among many my classmates) couldn’t resist the temptation of the local bakery.

Look at that place!

Regardless. Times were tight on our family so it was either buy donughts for breakfast or eat a healthy lunch…You know how this ends.

As I was walking out one day I saw what I believe now to be a homeless man sifting through the dumpster on the side of the building. He pull out a few flat boxes that looked familiar. I saw him open one and pull out a pastery. He examined it for a few moments and then took a big bite out of it. Initially I thought that was disqusting but I saw him do it a few times more.

It got me to thinking to thinking, if he could them, then so could….

Not too long after when no one was around I rifled through the dumpster, pulled out a box full of probably day-old Long Johns and proceeded to the school playground. Naturally holding a big box of something generates enough attention from a pack of school kids where upon i displayed my goods and declared a price of a $1 per Long John.

Sold out in minutes.

I did this a few times but after a few more the principle noticed the gig and asked me (told me) I am no longer allowed to sell doughnuts on the playground. She informed the authorities (aka my parents) as well so the gig was truly up.

So if you’re reading this and you were by chance a classmate of mine who ate one of my delicious garbage donughts I believe we’re well beyond the statute of limitations to seek any legal recourse.