“ 30+ years doing what his two sons have vowed never to do: raise a family.”
Sad, really. Among all the things humans “do”, the ‘doing’ in “passing on life”, spending the time, energy, trouble and inconvenience (of a lifetime) in both bringing into this world, as well as raising, and (thereafter), always being “there” for them, as long as we live, is the MOST and the GREATEST, in so many ways, of DOing, IMHO.
Of course, (honestly, not bragging), as the father of nine children (by one wife, to be sure), I have been, myself, a very flawed and imperfect father. So was mine, the father of eight children (I’m #6 of his 8 children, and #2 of just 2 boys)!
Our six oldest children have married into families where their inlaws, even one foreign one, are better off than there dad (me) is, or will likely ever be! Nonetheless, what I and my wife have taught them, is a resourcefulness no ones gets being “well off”. As necessity is the “mother of invention”, so it is as the “father of resourcefulness”!
May I recommend ‘committing’ to that (hopefully, female @abuchanterrell), and marrying her. Gradually, (trust me on this), your fears will subside some (not completely). But when you start having children, and also hopefully, enough of them, having someone to “clean up” after you (retire), will help you be reassured someone is there to also “back you up”!