Big dreams, big plans

And then you have this crazy feeling of “want” in this universe.

You dream big, and that’s great. You dream of nice car, a nice wife, children or that job that if you have it will make you happy.

And you set these big goals on your mind, you say “I will run a marathon”. But you are not a runner. I will get a “6 pack”, but you don’t like training. Or you are together with a partner and you say “I will have children” and you forget how to live and enjoy your life together. Today.

Or even here, in Medium, you think you will write an article and you will become famous or your amazing article will be picked by Medium stuff. But you are not a well trained writer yet.

And all these big dreams make you forget about what you love doing now. They are adding you pressure.

You try to find the perfect words while writing an article, you try to become charming while flirting a new girl that you like but you end up turning her away because you don’t enjoy the moment that you are having together. Because your mind is busy making all the crazy big dreams and plans that if you succeed on this very little moment asking her for a date, you will be happy. That you will travel together, do crazy stuff together, all those things that your mind has planned.

But love and goals are not just one small moment of “success”. And maybe you will not be happy traveling or that job that you really think will change your life if you succeed in the interview, will not make you happy. Because probably your hiring manager is a better negotiator than you. And you will accept the “lower than your expectations” salary he offered you and that’s against you big goals.

And then you start becoming a better negotiator. And then you flirt better. Because you are who you are. And you are not scared about who you are. You learn yourself and know you can do it. You learn to identify what makes you happy and what not. Everyday. And you work on your happiness.

And if you gave up running for this marathon after 3–4 weeks of training, then that’s ok. Maybe your body needed some training for a month and that’s all. It doesn’t have to be everyday like that one friend that does so. She likes it, you don’t. But if you got hooked by the everyday feeling of running, then you might like running more. Or if you like having your mind melted over a piece of puzzling code then you like coding. And that’s who you are and what you like.

Dream big and don’t make plans. Plans are failing. Every time. Find what you love, even for some short time. And if you like it, chase it, with no expectations, just your love. Because if you love it, you don’t expect anything as return. Your love is enough. And you know it.