Maximal Social Intolerance
The letter from the recruiter is probably symptomatic for whole societies and/or industries. There are many socially programmed assumptions behind this guy’s statement, and he is so obviously unable to see them. The same applies to the google story.
Sanctioned sexism: the man is that way because he was brought up to think like that, poor guy, we need to help him.
No, no excuses. Especially in the USA, you are responsible for your actions and the consequences of those actions. So you are also responsible for correcting your behaviour if it sucks.
Worse; go to a different culture and/or industry and you will see more or less the same, to different degrees. Some cultures and industries — over a hundred years after universal suffrage in most western societies — are finally getting it right. But there is a long way to go.
Transparency and openness about this is the only way to improve things.