Bresha Meadows and the Silence that Condemns Black Men

The Criminal Justice system in America is reckless, destructive, and inconsiderate of circumstance; especially when it comes to Black women who fall on the wrong side of the socioeconomic markers of society. Consider the case of Bresha Meadows, a 14 year old girl who is now facing a life sentence for killing her abusive father as her mother calls her a hero, yet in the eyes of the legal system, Bresha is a criminal. The unfortunate truth exposed by this is that Ms. Meadows is not an anomaly when it comes to penalizing Black women for surviving abuse. When you look at the statistics provided by the National Center for Domestic Violence, women who are survivors of domestic violence make up 75% of all incarcerated women in America, and in California alone, 67% of women in prison for killing a significant other did so in self defense. When you examine the statistics provided by the University of Minnesota’s Institute on Domestic Violence in the African American Community, you discover that Black women face domestic violence at a 35% higher rate than their White counterparts, which means that of this 75% of women in prison after surviving domestic violence, you can reasonably infer that most of these women are Black. Which directly signals an indication of the blatant devaluation of Black women by the Criminal Justice system, as much as we bemoan the deaths of Black men at the hands of law enforcement when officers get not guilty pleas, what is not as publicly discussed is the tendency of the courts of law to imprison Black women for having the audacity to survive at all costs. Not only should we look at the Criminal Justice system’s inability and unwillingness to protect the rights of Black women to life and liberty, but we should look intensely at the growing list of Black women who have been killed by Black men for the crime of rejection.

Over the last few weeks, there have been at least three stories of women who said no, and then were killed for exercising their own autonomy, and the chances are favorable that we know a woman who has been followed or forced to feel uncomfortable by a man who would not take no for an answer. Now, if the courts and the legal system will not protect the rights and wishes of Black women to exist without being coerced or forced to comply with the wishes of toxic masculinity, then it should fall to Black men to reaffirm the right of Black women to choose or not choose to comply with the wishes of men. What these statistics bear out, however, is the complete opposite of that. Black men, by and large, are the main enforcers of toxic masculinity and the oppressors of Black women both in our communities and in the everyday interactions between Black men and women who are complete strangers. Here is where it gets a bit complex for Black men, as we can understand and we can see our own oppression, but we often suffer from cognitive dissonance when Black women present us with the privilege which we walk around with and the ways by which we protect White Supremacy in our oppression of Black women. It is far too easy for us to see how racism affects us, but it is far too difficult for us to see how racism and sexism take a toll on Black women, mostly because we do not experience the same framing of this oppression that Black women experience. Whereas as Black men we experience racially coded discrimination, Black women experience both racially and sexually coded discrimination, often simultaneously, and it is compounded and intensified when Black men who are loud about social justice are blind to the ways in which we too are complicit in the oppression of Black women. This also positions Black women in the uncomfortable space between their sex and their skin, necessitating that they choose their skin over their sex when in reality, they occupy both at the same time. This is a dangerous game that so-called “Pro-Black” Black men play with Black women, essentially telling them that they need to pick one, even as their oppression pushes on both fronts simultaneously.

How does this relate to Bresha Meadows? Quite simply that our collective silence leads Black women to feel as though it is exclusively Black women who take up for Black women, which makes Black women feel devalued and unappreciated by the same men who say that they love Black women. If we are going to love Black women, then we have to support Black women when they face injustice, oppression and violence, especially if that means we have to forcefully confront Black men who are parroting White Supremacy, even if they don’t yet realize it, because our silence is violent towards Black women. Quite simply, Bresha Meadows should be getting the same kind of push from Black men as Trayvon Martin, if for no other reason than the legal system is ready to render the same verdict it rendered in that case, and that verdict is that Black girls, much like Black boys, should not defend themselves when faced with bodily harm.

So, are we going to lock arms with our sisters, or are we going to let them fight this battle alone, too?