Blame and Improvement
Immediately following a defeat, it’s easy to find ourselves trying to discern how much was our fault, and how much was out of our control.
Despite the appeal, try to avoid being too hard on yourself during these times. Try not to assume more blame than you deserve.
Yes, blaming yourself can feel like the path to improvement, but too much self-blame can lead to shaky confidence and even poorer performance when you do try again.
And the truth is, the blame usually lies somewhere in the middle; some things you could have done better, some things just didn’t bounce your way.
When you catch yourself being your own critic, remember to be your own ally too. Try to identify room for improvement, but also cut yourself some slack. Often, identifying the good, the bad, and the out of your hands is what leads to most growth.