Or not. Your lack of familiarity with Complex Post Traumatic Stress Disorder, or actually a range of mental health disorders, doesn’t surprise me. People barely understand Post Traumatic Stress Disorder, and everyone knows what war does to people. For the yet to be updated, C-PTSD affects the portion of our population who have been subjected to repeated, long-term abuse or neglect. Foster children have twice the rate of PTSD as soldiers.
You say, “ You had a hard life, you had some pain — okay cool, everyone does. Shake that shit off and get on with the fucking show.” That is patently false. Everyone does not have a hard life. In fact, the calculations done by researchers show that only 12% of Americans experience 4 or more of the Adverse Childhood Experiences, while a full 36% of Americans never experience any. That means 1 in 3 Americans are walking around having never gone through any of the major adverse childhood events. Another 30% have only had one adverse childhood experience.
Now, therapeutically, what do we know about people with C-PTSD. They are walking wounds. Yes. Most importantly, they need to talk about what happened to them. Over and over. It counteracts the years of shame, silence, and self-blame that surrounds being one of those subjected to these experiences. NO, they are not like everyone else. They haven’t had some pain. They have pain so significant, researchers have found scores of neuro-endocrinological indicators in these people signaling their childhood pain. For example, inflammatory agents are increased in adults with these backgrounds. For more information on this, please see Gabor Mate, but there are others.
Your pseudopsychology of telling everyone to just move on is exactly what people in pain have been hearing their whole lives, because people don’t tolerate listening to each other’s pain very well. Damaged people have typically never been given space to emotionally react to what has happened to them or receive support from a community for it. In books like, “The Body Keeps the Score,” you find that bottling up these emotions leads to disease.
Please don’t add to the stigma of recovery from numerous conditions that comes from writing it out. It shouldn’t be judged, especially as you did. It shouldn’t be mistaken for cognitive failure. It should be seen as emotional release for people who have endured far *more* than other Americans have.