I would not be interested in anyone that is “anything acting”. I would only be interested in someone who is who they are, not someone putting on a show for anyone including themselves.
I’m Bi and no one knew except me until i met my husband. I was married to a woman for 11 years and had a great sex life. She was the first person I had sex with on our wedding day (it was before the wedding but it was on my wedding day.) She started with diet pills then needed a sedative to calm her nerves from the pills and was using medication to regulate her mood. When I found out she was getting drugs from doctors in two states. I told her to get help and then she faked having terminal cancer, so I left her. While married I had no interest in men.
Then after separating I met my Husband after 1 hour of talking I was in love. We had sex on the first date and have been monogamous for over 24 years. Everyone was shocked that I was with a man. My husband’s family knew he was gay only because after he divorced he was only seen with men. He wasn’t out at work. They had a family only event at the plant and you could have knocked them over with a feather when he brought me as his spouse. We were not passing we were just who we are.
My husband is not handy at doing much of anything around the house, or on the farm. But enjoyed it more than me. He was a Baptist preacher and he is the best people person I have met and is the best with helping people through hard times. He started an AID’s program in our city and wrote a book they still use in Aid’s programs. He watched 137 friends die and was getting burned out after contracting hepatitis. We are both ordained and he has done weddings funerals and baptisms.
At my lesbian great niece’s funeral I kissed my husband at the sign of piece and we held hand as we left the catholic church in my small home town. I had a great talk with the priest after introducing him to my husband. I didn’t know him other than him doing two of my brothers funerals just after coming to town . But I wanted to think him for doing a great job at the funeral were he even cried. She used to be a server at the church. I did not know he blessed the rings for her and her partner. He said it was just the right thing to do. He asked if I caught the 5 or 6 gay friendly comments he made at the service. I told him I did but I thought all but two probably went over the parishioners head. Then he was at a party at my sisters and we talked more. He has one day a week off and comes to our big city to a mens spaw for manicures, pedicures and hair cuts. We invited him to contact us when he comes to town and we would take him out for dinner and drinks. He passes as straight until we talked in private.
He can’t change a tire but he was building cars. He created an offline job to improve quality by finding when something was not done by standards. He loves sports. I have no interest. Being a farm boy I can handle animals we had over 200 at one time. I had bee hives and canned over 1,000 jars of produce that year. I have rebuilt transmissions a few cars motors, repaired tractors and what ever needed to be done. I rewired our abandoned farmhouse put in new plumbing, heating, air. replaced glass in all but one window, painted it, decorated it, put in a water well added a pond, have repaired all appliances. Taking down a huge locust tree that was to close to the house. We sold the farm to the parks department for 8 times what we gave for it. Then built and decorated a new house and it turned out perfect. I have toured more than a hundred new houses at Home Aromas and have not liked one better than ours even at three times the price. I’m great at arranging flowers. I put huge arrangements on the family graves in my small home town. The local florist had repeated request to do their graves as I did but she had to admit that it was just a family member that installed them. My sister and husband was in New Orleans and met a couple that had went to a funeral there and wanted to know what florist did the flowers on the graveyard. They could not believe it was her brother who is not a florist. We get more compliments on our house than I ever imagined. I have cooked for more than 100 people at weddings, parties and baptisms on the farm.
I’m not bragging just making the point that we are who we are, we are not putting on a show for anyone. My husband was attracted to me because I have a hint of red in my hair. he had on a hat that caught my eye and he made a cute clicking sound. He asked me to go home with him over 50 times. I made him drive me because I new I would chicken out during the 40 minute drive. He told me his history during the drive and I fell in love on the first day. I’ve had sex with two people in my life and I couldn’t be happier. I have friends that are very effeminate and I thanks that’s great but I am not sexually attracted to them. Both of us are just who we are. We do not fit any stereotypes. And we are attracted to who we are attracted to and there is nothing wrong with that. But don’t rule out the great people you may get to know who you originally might not think you would be attracted to you might be surprised of the great person that may come into your life. Or make a great friend. We should all be free to be who we are anyway we are.