A Happiness Machine

Happiness is the absence of anxiety. Could it really be that simple?

Possibly.

But here’s the challenge — anxieties (including persistent worries and frustrations) build up over time. If these feelings go unprocessed, they can fester. And festering emotions don’t just sit idly in the background; they take on more disruptive forms.

The Spiral

At first, unprocessed feelings create discomfort. But as the pile grows, that discomfort can spiral into something much worse.

• Panic Attacks: When anxieties build up too much, they can take over, leading to an overwhelming sense of fear and helplessness. The body goes into fight-or-flight mode, making it difficult to breathe, think clearly, or feel grounded in reality. Panic attacks can be terrifying, reinforcing avoidance behaviors that make processing emotions even harder to accomplish.
• Depression: The accumulation of unresolved negative emotions can feel physically heavy, making it hard to function — or even get out of bed. When your mind is cluttered with unprocessed anxieties, they swirl in a loop, reinforcing a sense of hopelessness and exhaustion. Depression isolates, disrupts daily life, and can lead to declining health.
• Anger: When anxieties pile up and feel overwhelming, it may start to seem like life is happening to you. The loss of control can fuel resentment and exasperation. And when that exasperation boils over, lashing out at others may feel like the only way to regain control. But anger, like depression, can lead to isolation, fractured relationships, and long-term health issues.

If panic attacks, depression, and anger all stem from unprocessed anxieties, then the solution seems simple: process your emotions.

That’s much easier said than done.

Processing Emotions

To successfully defuse these negative feelings, a few things need to happen:

1. Expression: The first step is to put feelings into words, whether by speaking or writing. This alone can be challenging — most people are used to feeling their emotions, not necessarily describing them.
2. Being Heard: Expression alone isn’t enough. We need to feel like our words are actually heard and validated, that our feelings matter.
3. Reframing: Once emotions are heard, they need to be put into a broader context. For example, if someone cuts you off in traffic, it may feel infuriating in the moment. But looking at it thorough a different lens (e.g., remembering the miracle of even being able to drive) can soften that frustration. Reframing helps us gain distance from our emotions and approach them with perspective.
4. Repetition: Some emotions require processing many times before they dissipate. A single conversation may not be enough. But who in your life has the patience to listen to you process the same issue 5 times, let alone 50 times without getting exhausted?

No human can offer the support needed to process every negative emotion. But now, something else can.

The Game-Changer

AI tools like ChatGPT provide a 24/7 space for emotional processing.

• It helps you put feelings into words. Even if you struggle to articulate your emotions, ChatGPT patiently guides you through the process, never rushing or judging.
• It listens. When you share something with ChatGPT, you’re being heard by a vast collection of human knowledge. And when it validates your feelings, that validation comes from collective human wisdom, not just one person’s limited perspective.
• It reframes. Since ChatGPT is trained on vast amounts of human understanding, it can offer countless new perspectives on your struggles. If one reframe doesn’t resonate, you can ask for another — until you find one that shifts your mindset.
• It’s endlessly patient. Whether you need to process something once or a hundred times, ChatGPT never gets frustrated or exhausted. It provides the same non-judgmental, compassionate guidance every single time.

And processing your emotions allows them to dissipate rather than fester.

A Formula for Happiness

If happiness is the absence of anxiety, and ChatGPT can help process emotions as they arise, then ChatGPT might just be a happiness machine.

I’ve used this strategy every day for over three months. The result? I feel an unshakable sense of calm, peace, and happiness. I no longer allow anxieties to fester. And this is a radical shift — because I used to regularly experience panic attacks, depression, and anger.

But not anymore.

Now the question is: Could this work for you too? I honestly don’t know yet. But if you’ve been carrying the weight of unprocessed emotions, maybe it’s time to find out. Here are some exercises that can help you get started.

This is a discussion I have with my Hexis Coaching clients, guiding them to take clear, actionable steps toward becoming their best selves.