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4 SIMPLE TIPS TO FIND THE RIGHT THERAPIST

The past few weeks I have talked about why therapy is so important for our emotional health. If reading this blog has made you think….Hmm, maybe I WOULD benefit from talking to someone, then this post is for you.

1) PAY ATTENTION TO HOW YOU FEEL

Researching therapists online will find a breadth of modalities of treatment but may still leave you wondering what is right for me?

It’s just my opinion, but I believe THE SINGLE MOST IMPORTANT PART OF THERAPY IS THE RELATIONSHIP.

This means you must feel connected to…

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SAVING FOR YOUR CHILD’S EMOTIONAL FUTURE

I have a little joke with myself and friends. When we talk about saving for our children’s future I always say, “I have their college savings, and the other jar — the one for their therapy.” People often laugh. I can tell they get a little uncomfortable at the thought that “their child” might ever need therapy, as if in some way that is a reflection on them as a person or as a failure of a parent.

Here’s the deal, sometimes it is a reflection on them (which is not necessarily the worst…

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My Perspective from BOTH Sides of the Couch

“It all becomes beautiful when you know yourself”-Unknown

This was the quote I saw every Wednesday at 12:55 pm for almost 7 years. Where did I go every Wednesday for 7 years at the same time you wonder? That’s easy: therapy, where else? But, I hesitated sharing this…

As a therapist, I was trained to be “a blank slate.” Patients come to us and project their wishes, fantasies and desires, and as the theory goes (simplified of course), it is our job to help them make their unconscious conscious.

Knowing about your…

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“It all becomes beautiful when you know yourself”-Unknown

This was the quote I saw every Wednesday at 12:55 pm for almost 7 years. Where did I go every Wednesday for 7 years at the same time you wonder? That’s easy: therapy, where else? But, I hesitated sharing this…

As a therapist, I was trained to be “a blank slate.” Patients come to us and project their wishes, fantasies and desires, and as the theory goes (simplified of course), it is our job to help them make their unconscious conscious.

Knowing about your therapist has the potential to muddy those waters…

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“Everything is great and THAT is why I am here!” Said nobody ever when they walked through my office door. Nor do they claim, “I want to learn more about myself and continue on this path!!”

Typically, crisis is what brings us to therapy when we can no longer continue with our own status quo.

Usually, you can recognize a symptom. Maybe it is anxiety and we are having difficulty breathing. Perhaps a panic attack resulted in a hospital visit and then no medical reason is determined. These people often find themselves on my couch.

Sometimes, it is sleepless nights…

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Happy New Year!!

When I can tear myself away from Chicago, I love to vacation near an ocean. I find the waves completely captivating, although I probably should be paying more attention to my kids, who are swimming in those swells. Every seven seconds and with nothing to stop them. The waves, I mean, and, well the kids too.

What does this have to do with keeping your resolutions? I’m glad you asked!

This past week social media had been flooded with everyone’s resolutions and ways to reach your goals. I’m sure you’ve noticed too. (Don’t miss my post on…

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AHH, ’tis the season. The time to mail your holiday cards with amazing looking children, partners, and of course, perfect animals. I relish in getting these cards; enjoying how family and friends are doing — seeing it first hand.

That said, I do not send my own cards. Part of my reason is sheer laziness and organization. Not forgetting someone, trying to hunt down address and mail in a timely fashion is just beyond me.

I often find myself wondering when I receive these beautiful cards, what are the stories behind each happy face? Similar to the perfect vacation shares…

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My friend’s son was shot and killed last year on the streets of Chicago. The violence that I was so easily distancing myself from had finally touched me…directly.

As a mother, but also a therapist, I was desperate to understand.

The pain of this tragedy shook me to my very core. The manner in which her son was murdered was horrific.

People ask me how he died; if he was in a gang; if he did something terrible too. The answer(s) is: I am not sure, and honestly, I am not sure it matters.

It seems we ask these questions…

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One could say happiness is just a series of happy moments strung together, surrounded by a range of other experiences.

Everyone wants to be happier; to “get to” happiness, as though it’s the final destination. Have we been led to believe that happiness is like the end of the Candyland board where your world is sugary sweet and once we get there, we get to stay?

I would never tell you that happiness is not something to strive for, but perhaps that shouldn’t be the end game.

Let’s look at Candyland, the game many play as a child, as a…

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Have you ever struggled to reach a goal? Such as, losing 20 lbs, saving money, looking for a new job, giving up a habit, like smoking, drinking, you name it. I’m not suggesting it’s easy. I really don’t think it is; but perhaps it’s easier than we think.

This analogy has often helped me reconsider how to be successful in reaching my goals.

It’s doubtful you would stand at the bottom of Mount Everest and say, “I am going to climb right to the top”. “No breaks for me!! And I’m doing it right now!”

But let’s be real, If…

Dr. Amy Robbins

Clinical psychologist| wife | mom of 3 | speaker | writer| inspired to teach the art of human connection www.dramyrobbins.com

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