Facebook Angry Emoji Supplies Near Zero

Yesterday evening, when Mindy Parish first saw a post about Trump’s latest racist tweet in her Facebook feed, she did what she has done so many times over the past three years; she clicked the angry face. Calling up the scowling, head shaking emoji of indignation had become routine for her. What appeared on her screen in response was anything but. “We are facing a dire shortage of Angry Emoji’s. Please consider expressing another emotion,” pleaded the textbox.

Around the country, dwindling supplies of the orange scowl have caused anxiety and consternation. “We never imagined this could happen,” bemoaned Marvin Visage, the Manager of Facebook’s emoji supply program. “Shortages have been a problem ever since Trump came into office, but our suppliers had been able to keep up,” explained an exhausted Visage, “Until now.”

At a press conference this afternoon, Facebook Founder and CEO, Mark Zuckerberg, stated the company was looking at all alternatives to address the crisis. “We have just identified several countries, including Canada, Denmark, and New Zealand, where angry emoji’s routinely go unused and we can buy their surplus supplies. Hell, Canadians have never figured out what to do with an angry Emoji.”

Facebook is also considering rationing supplies of angry emojis. Analysts at Facebook have found that a small percentage of…