Voices in my head
The line between sanity and insanity seems blurred. Am I losing my mind ? Or am I finding my self? I can no longer go through the motions of life. I’ve always been invisible and made home somewhere right in the middle. Extrodinarly good at being ordinary. Fear are the shackles that have tied me to this life. Am I losing my mind or finding myself ? Is there a point where the patient realizes he is insane or does the patient see everything as the same. Although this dark forest that I’m walking through scares me, it also provides clarity. It’s seems like I’ve always had something to keep me from finding my truth. Now more than ever I know every moment I waste in my cubicle is like a prison sentence where nothing good can come through. The irony is that the majority of people I’ve come across would give it all to have what I have. But to me it’s just not what I want and what I need to be. This job , this insurance , this pension , this mediocrity. I’m just not here to be comfortable living a ordinary safe mundane life. I have only one shot and I gotta take it. At this point I just have to figure out how to get out of the lifelong treadmill of pointlessness. I have to climb towards purpose. With that being said I have to provide sun, water and soil to my seeds. I am obligated eternally to provide and to teach. How can I risk it all on dream. A dream that I can t really make out. But I dreamed in color. I know I was in a different space and time. As I slowly begin to recognize the man in the mirror finally, I realize I must drift away from my flesh and strengthening my mind, while living in my spirit. This is just a continuance of writing my way out of circumstances that have shackled me to mediocrity, made me a slave to fear and oppressed my spirit. However I have realized that my pen is the key to removing the shackles, my faith is the savior that liberate my courage, and my truth is going to give wings to my spirit. I know now how I must proceed. Unlocking thee most high, thee one, thee creator, thee god in me.
David Dominique Marcel Holmes